Please stop faxing me and trying to find out my real identity (I’m Jonathan Taylor Thomas) because I’ll (Jonathan Taylor Thomas) never ever tell you (that I’m actually Jonathan Taylor Thomas, voice of the lion king and son of Tool Time).
Welcome to the lacrosse field, rookie. Rules are simple. 74 men in mesh shorts try to capture your egg with their nets. Any questions? No? Good. Just go sign up with Montana and Breshley at the Bud Light Lime stage and they’ll give you the organic pecan oil you’ll need for your uniform.
i got a tattoo of Ryan Tannehill and now i’m a laughingstock
I thought tennis was the one where two men wearing crotchless wet suits stand on opposite sides of a 47 foot long tube and try to blow a cockroach, which has been placed inside the tube, through the length of the tube and into their opponent’s mouth, but hey you learn something every single day here on the web.
Somewhere Bill Belichick just became urgently aroused, and he doesn’t know why.
I mean, I could be wrong, but it feels like the “average person” can’t get in the home buying game in the first place right now, because rents are so high and wages are so low that even if you could pay a mortgage, you can’t save enough to make a down payment. Idk the specifics of Point, but sacrificing a percentage…
That reminds me of my dad and how he’d drive his IROC-Z onto the court where I was playing youth basketball and skid that thing real close to me while I was trying to shoot a free throw. If I missed, he’d flick a cigarette at me, peel out, and I wouldn’t see him for months. If I made the shot he’d nod at me…
I am sorry I became the big bad Pissboy. I am now the Swimmin’ Prince and the big bad Pissboy for I have brought my body’s water onto the land in a shameful way. In the water land where I live, one must only smile and relax and allow the piss to flow from within. We live in the piss pools and we die in the piss pools.…
I wanted you to be the first to know that I have purchased Gawker with my money and we will now exclusively publish incoherent ramblings about celebs, tech celebs, teens, tots, potato farmers, athletes, extreme athletes, desktop computers, shoes, and Poppe Culture, a senile former miner from Kentucky who got himself…
Finally, the moment my stupid Kinja handle has been waiting for.
I totally get where Antonio’s coming from.
Rusty Kuntz Jr.
What distance could a football be punted by you?
Having a team in LA affects TV rights deals big time. That pie Jerry’s got both chin-balls deep inside.
Jerry knows a lot about balls. He’s had so many facelifts that his are now located right below his chin.
this part is my fav
You could have gone out to West Philly any time to “get smarter.”
Mark Brunnell seems to cry a lot about weird things. He might want to get that checked out.
“...one of the funniest stories I ever heard...”