The big chain craft stores in my neck of Texas started selling Mum-making services basically right after school started. They had miles of ribbon already, so all they really had to do was stock cowbells and stick-on lettering in local school colors.

Echoing the "please don't teach your daughters to hover" sentiment. Your butt has been inside pants all day, not exposed to the germs you're so worried about.

A little surprised no one has said vinegar. Vinegar is amazing.

Boy do they ever: http://www.containerstore.com/shop?productId=10025853&N=&Ns=p_sort_default%7C0&Ntt=scoop

On the plus side, I just discovered that I can make all the FB text appear upside-down. Deliriously happy about that.