I read that in Matthew Mcconaughey's voice.

He's not your friend, he's just some guy who wants to stick his dick in you. Once. And then he wants to go stick his dick in other people who aren't you.

What can you tell about the "lifestyle" of a patient during an examination?

I just found out last week that my gyno wouldn't even talk to me about Plan B or ANY alternatives because I missed three days of my birth control on accident and had unprotected sex. I'm currently in the market for a new gyno who won't push her religious beliefs onto me.

Am I the only one who thinks that twice a week sounds like a lot? Especially in a stable LTR/marriage - that's twice a week, every week, forever? I like sex with Mr. Peach just fine but we just don't get around to it that often because we're tired. Sad excuse, but dual income relationships with challenging jobs don't…

Thinking about a pre-nup is a sign that you're a grown up who understands that not everything is unicorns and roses. It's not "So since we're eventually gonna get divorced", it's "We both acknowledge that sometimes life doesn't go the way you planned, so let's make sure it's as un-messy as it can be."

You Got Brominated!

You're thinking of Ryan Reynolds. Ryan Reynolds is never going to happen, and really, hasn't despite all the promotion anyone can muster.

Somebody order pancakes, I just sip the sizzurp

I just feel like I need to say this: After your children are born, your happiness should now be second to theirs. Your childrens' needs should always come first, and a prospective parent should consider that before making such a huge commitment!

I JUST READ IT FOR THE ARTICLES.

I like my Kardashian wedding planning the way I like my butts: OUTTA CONTROL!

There are a few things I never question people about and one of them is their spiritual beliefs. Life is hard and heartbreaking and whatever people need to hold it together, I'll never fault them for it.

According to chemistry, alcohol is a solution.

Not to make sweeping generalizations or anything...

"Don't like rape? don't get raped"

Also, not surprising that all the dicks this strawfeminist would take are black in his mind.

.....And we're sure this isn't just viral marketing for a sequel to I Am Charlotte Simmons?

This is not the point of the story, but I FUCKING HATE fraternities and most of their members. Not every frat guy is awful, I know that because I know some of the non-awful ones, but the majority that I meet are complete assholes. I also live in Dallas which is the land of current and former frat guys, and they are…