The amount of cognitive dissonance going on there is staggering.

“being a lawyer”

That is creepy as hell. It’s difficult enough just being a normal woman in the world, being a female celebrity must be fucking awful at times.

No beef, but since we are playing “Name That Atrocity”, what’s your racial background? Don’t come at me if there’s even a drop of Anglo blood in your body or that sure would be “ironic”.

What’s ironic? Are you saying that because hundreds of years ago, the Maori people committed murder, we can’t be upset about murder happening now? We try to show some solidarity and you feel the need to point out our ancestors once killed people too? Yeah, that was definitely worth pointing out. Thanks.

Both my brother and I, as children, would have our spaghetti on one side of the plate and a small pool of sauce on the other side, and would individually drag each noodle through the saucepool before slurping it down. Luckily, we’re now adults and eat our pasta like normal people.

How do you know you don’t like the texture? ... unless you HAVE tried pasta!

My 4 year old niece loves pasta but hates tomato sauce. She also demands sauce less pizza, the heathen.

Or ramen? Or chicken noodle soup? Or pai thai?

Ravioli? Empanades? Perogies? I was skipping over the article but the lede brain wormed and fuck me here I am questioning the eating habits someone I don’t know.

The next time I lose my Kinja key (so, soon) I’m coming back to life under the handle “TheOrlandoBloomOfStarches”

Bull. Fucking. Shit. She’s trying to tell us that she’s never had macaroni and cheese? PUH-LEASE.

ETA - Wow. Apparently I have strong feelings on this. Who knew??

Teach your children America’s foundation built on the rule of law

Lorelei Gilmore would love those shoes.

I am Team Nobody here. People are insufferable on both sides. People, this woman just had a baby, leave her alone. But also, shut up, Chrissy, you DO care what people say. That’s why you’re posting pictures of your midriff a month after your daughter was born with the excuse caption “mother’s day brunch” BS.

I don’t know where you live, but my friend is about 36 weeks and we live in Atlanta and its 293487239847928374 degrees and I’m like, bless you, woman. I let her borrow some caftans for the summer, haha.

Post Baby!

As a preggo, UGH. The only things I can eat mashed potatoes and buttered pasta. My post baby body will be a round, squishy mass and I'll smile and wave at all my fans.