I will not read that post, but I WILL assume that it's going to take a LOT more stories about adorable old people and baby animals in wee clothing to atone for it. Because now we are all aware that Vagina Yogurt is even a thing. What's next? Sperm Jello?? Poop Truffles? Belly Button Custard?

Yea, as long as there is actually a little old man who knit tiny sweaters for baby, oil-slicked penguins on Earth somewhere, I'm good. That they all have Aussie accents: BONUS!!

Awww, LGBT friendly penguin sweater. He should make them a sweater with a giant walrus on it, so a giant seal doesn't eat them.

Ok, but only one is potty-trained and you won't know WHICH until they get there!

"This story is actually awful, even forinTouch: the 'loid claims that his Bitch Daughter Kylie "didn't seem to be worried about her father when she partied the night away and Instagrammedphotos with sister Kendall and half sister Khloe at a Grammys afterparty." STOP"

This better not be some shenanigans over money, or I will hurt someone at Comedy Central. He has seemed a bit burnt out lately, but I'd rather that then not having ANYONE!!

Yea, no, don't do that, that would be justifiable homicide. I'll take your word for it ;-)

"She wears too much make-up to be genuine" had got to be the reality show quote of the century. Also, homegirl has that death stare DOWN.

I have never watched a Kardashian program, and never will, but does she cry like that because of the Botox or because she's just that bad at faking?

I'm fairly certain most reality show participants have Narcissistic Personality Disorder. They even give them long questionnaires to screen for the most "dramatic" (unstable) people. It's kind of gross.

I dunno, I kinda like the girl pouring the train o' champers. I feel like we could be friends.

Sweet, sweet karma. Sweet, sticky, slightly salty karma.

Yes, Exactly! What the hell is the name of that movie again?

I was thinking the only way it could be acceptable is if Kris plays herself and is a patient suffering from the worst feminine odor the doctors have ever encountered.

Here let me help you: sociopath.

You should totally spread the rumor that War Machine got it by being in the center of a bukkake scene to the guys in the prison.

If anything is gonna put you in a committed relationship with JC, it's gonorrhea of the eyehole.

Aww, Cambodia! Don't deport them, what fun is that? Just let them stew in one of your lovely prisons for a couple of days!

Episcopalian or Unitarian?

They also encourage the poor to become poorer, and create MORE poor people by outlawing birth control. They are actually responsible for a lot of the suffering in Catholic Third World countries, so it's pretty much a zero-sum game as far as "helping" the poor.