Typical ninja bait and switch bullshit.

It takes three wire coat-hangers and a bicycle pump.

(Knees hit the ground. Savagely prays for the Old Ones to return.)

Holy crap yes. I tried rereading that story the other night and forgot about the cat. More than a little distracting considering the narrator talks about the feline in every other sentence. In honor of Lovecraft I named my cat "Cracker Asshole."

I'll carry on

R.I.P. Frosted tips. A crestfallen Guy Fieri carries on. #frostedtipsdiamondnips

I think this fellow should be put into my 10,000 Maniacs tribute state-run institution.

That would have at least been interesting. No, I just liked this squid news when it was on every other site before the AV Club over the last couple of days.

Great Job, Gawker!

You're trying to hard for attention, internet. I'd say go to your room but frankly I'm supportive of you running away. Maybe then the cloud of shame will lift from this house. THIS BROKEN MARRIAGE IS YOUR FAULT INTERNET. You're old enough to hear the truth.

Won't someone think of the man-children!?!?!?

Wow. Clint can go fuck himself along with all the close-minded garbage men of his generation. After embarrassing himself last election by talking to empty chairs I thought he'd keep his mouth shut. I guess money and fame doesn't get rid of the pent up anger and bigotry. Clint needs to "fucking get over" the fact that…

Internet, do I look like I want to do an object search from motherf&*%ing Highlights magazine!

Twist ending: they're BOTH the madman. Shyamalan-ed!

Not fun fact: Ian Ziering insists that his first name is pronounced "Eye-an." Not "Ee-an." That's nonsense.

In part it will be like "Weekend at Bernie's" but with a dead prostitute and you keep hoping they get caught. I propose Jon Lithgow as the politician and Danny McBride as the PR man. And suddenly my mind flashed to an image of the star of "Frankenhooker." I need a moment with this…

Does this have anything to do with Paul Stanley blasting his Love Gun all over my car every other f-king day? Did Smash Face buy his gun off of Ace?! God damn Kiss….

Legal stuff.

Gizmodo's "Today's Best Deals" is that you?

800 people allowed in daily. Roughly 550 leave mostly intact but never the same.