Corpse levees can’t possibly smell any worse than modern day wildwood nj

BUT UNWRITTEN RULES OF THE GAME

Dammit, now I want an Orange Julius.

It’s always goony in Philadelphia

I once knew a girl from Hoboken. She claimed that her cherry was broken from riding a bike down a cobblestone pike (but truly was broken from pokin’)

HE. MADE. A. FOUR. YEAR. OLD. CHILD’S. SCROTUM. BLEED.

I thought this was going to be another anti-small dog post.

I totally blame my family and my job for only being on level 27 in Pokemon Go.

Shouldn’t be that hard to stop Kessel. After all, he’s too fat to play hockey.

Lest we forget, round the corner fudge is made.

If it wasn’t for second-half performances like Atlanta’s, there’d be no need for Gregg Easterbrook.

What about all the Cowboys fans who’ve never been to Dallas?

I always assumed Marcie grew up to be Lynette Guycott.

So are the 2010's going to be a memorable decades for movies? I’ve really been out of the loop since I started having kids.

I once ordered Korean takeout when a co-worker was pregnant. Ruined her day.

I truly can’t hate any of their players anymore. Well, there’s still Jerrah...

So sick of these millenials baby boomers resorting to vandalism when they don’t get their way. Toughen up, snowflakes.

Yet another potential wedge issue completely wasted by the Hillary campaign.

Never understood why pineapple is added to meat dishes. I mean, I’ll cherry-pick the shit out of it at the breakfast buffet fruit salad, but it just sounds gross with ham or chicken.