You should see my mom frantically flailing it around while doing her best Count voice in front of 20 transfixed first-graders. They are rapt; they cannot take their eyes off it. She has to remind them it's a puppet. It is fucking adorable.

My mom teaches small children and occasionally uses a Count Von Count puppet (from Sesame Street) when working with math/numbers. She does the voice, the accent, the whole nine yards; the kids love it.

Blanca wasn't watching porn on the cellphone, she was talking to and sending pics to her boyfriend on the outside.

Oh, I have this mascara. It's pretty good, but it is not better than sex.

They're already well on their way to taking over northwest Orange County...NEXT, THE WORLD!

We already have a kickass banh mi chain in Southern California. Lee's Sandwiches, anyone? It's everywhere in Orange County and a sandwich comes in at like $3. I just inhaled a #5 in my car on my way to work earlier today.

I love the term "partner" to describe one's significant other because it implies equality and a sense of togetherness that the other terms don't quite encapsulate. Like, this person isn't just my boyfriend/girlfriend, he/she's my PARTNER! We work together to get shit done, we have a great time together even when…

When you come visit, you can get on my couch.

Oh, we're smoking beforehand and on the way there as well, don't you worry. The other thing Anaheim has besides Disneyland? Tons of dispensaries.

Anaheim local here and I also support Disneyland taking over all of Anaheim. Might finally get the crack dealer RV out of my neighborhood.

Agreed, Disney's customer service training is the best in the biz.

My boyfriend and I live less than a mile from the park, so we have passes because it's literally the closest thing to do that we can walk to. Now that summer's upon us the park is definitely more crowded, but for most of the year if you can get there RIGHT when it opens, you have pretty free reign of the park for…

People who are popular enough to get invited as underclassmen. I guess. I wouldn't know.

These are the words I know too!

I live right by Disneyland, so all the ice cream trucks on my tract play a bastardized version of "It's A Small World."

Everything I know about her a.) I learned on Jezebel and b.) points to her being the actual worst.

"Just in case you were wondering how rich, white, privileged, and uncreative Orange County is"

This is the first story I have ever heard that actually makes me think maybe I missed out on something by not going to college.

James Franco is so gross and yet the things that bums me out the most about this picture is his scuffed-up iPhone case with a few random faded stickers half-heartedly placed on it like the iPhone case of some teenaged girl.

Josh Groban is more entertaining on Twitter than as a singer.