Awareness began when the implant failed.

She returned to the wrong future.

Baby shoes for sale. Not housebroken.

The monkeys finished Halmet. Close enough.

My parents are both in their sixties and have never been called either. Meanwhile, I have an uncle who has been called six times and been selected four. I was called almost as soon as I turned 18, and had to ask for postponement because the first day of selection was my first day of college (yes, they granted it).

Anguish porn? Really?

If you've read The Eyre Affair by Jasper Fforde, then the only answer is the Prose Portal. Once you have a Prose Portal, everything mentioned in any of the rest of these comments becomes possible.

I remember the exact moment I gave up on The X-Files during its original run. It was during a making-of special that Fox ran between the movie and the next season of the show to get all the noobs up to speed. This is not a quote, but Chris Carter basically said "I had a plan at the beginning, but we blew through it…

This discussion would have happened toward the end of a hot, humid summer. My bread never got moldy, so I actually think the problem was that my roommate probably touched his bread more than he realized. As for the hygiene issue, he was... Um... The most tactful way I can think of to describe him is "single".

In some cases, refrigeration is preferable... Years ago I had a roommate who made almost daily trips to the grocery store because his bread would always become extremely moldy (like, comedically so) within a couple of days. I didn't find out about this for months because we didn't share any of the food, but one day…

Just on the subject of making all these horcruxes, you've reminded me of an alternate ending that a friend came up with when we were discussing being underwhelmed by the climax of the final book.

Yeah, the second one really feels to me like they're repeating a formula that worked rather than breaking new ground, but that doesn't stop the movie from being full of great lines. My favorite? "I want you to know that almost half of us voted for you in the last election."

Or for those of us who had taped it off of network TV...

I'll second this recommendation! The reader, Peter Yearsley, is excellent!

Welllll.... I don't know that this counts as hipsterism. The King in Yellow is practically required reading for hardcore fans of H.P. Lovecraft and his disciples. For some reason it wasn't enough for the book to be recommended by every bibliography and fan site and convention panel; it had to have an HBO show…

Also worth mentioning that Bierce's "Haita the Shepherd" names Hastur as the "god of shepherds". I'm not entirely caught up on the show so I'm not sure if the name Hastur has been spoken yet, but I imagine it will be... Certainly anyone who's read The King in Yellow will recognize that name.

As thrilled as I am that people are reading The King in Yellow, I can't help but be annoyed that the same people to whom I've been recommending it for fifteen years are now telling me that they've discovered this amazing book from the 1890s that I'd absolutely love...

I cannot bring myself to ruin your star count.

Where's the love for Mama Dracula?

The peas formed a word: ALMOST.