Can any of them play offensive line

You forgot Memphis. Also your list contains two entries of cities, one made up of two states, and one of one of the largest states in the country. I haven’t seen a list this bad since the Marchman debacle.

They don’t even have the best BBQ in Missouri

He was overrated before he overrated. He was so overrated it wasn’t even the hipster call. For two years now the pundit class has been talking up this dude AND HIS BEAUTIFUL CRISP PASSING while the rest of the country screams: “BUT HE CAN’T DEFEND THO! ISN’T THAT IMPORTANT IN CENTRAL DEFENCE? A BIT OF DEFENCE? NO? Oh…

4. Has Ben Affleck ever met an autistic person?

my personal theory is that we feel like we know these players much more than in the other sports. Most football players are masked death robots, and the majority of baseball superstars are unknown by face to the large majority of sports fans. For example, what percentage of fans would know Jose Altuve if he walked…

Thanks. These were good takes though.

Chris...don’t you make me like you.

She did come pre-packaged from a far away place and got his name stamped on her, so sure.

Shouldn’t you be fucking your cousin?

Who besides you said there is another conference that needs to be held up as the last bastion of integrity?

Ethics and SEC football are oxymoronic. Bama will cut that high school a check and order will be restored.

Yeah, what kind of sports website would cover the most famous player of the most popular sport in North America?

In one version of the game, you even get a GUN

Chuck E Cheese- I haven’t been to one of these places in ages. The video game cabinets have been replaced by educational games, but the animatronic show goes on. Across the table two time Super Bowl MVP, Eli Manning squirts Elmers glue into his mouth. As we wait for our sausage pizza, Eli leans in and confides that…

“Oh, and Carson Wentz is black in this game”

Yes, this 10,000-word profile of Tom Brady on a whole different website definitely proves that we at Deadspin are obsessed with Tom Brady.

Electrolytes: it’s what fancy dogs crave.

Trolling and then immediately admitting the troll and then justifying your own sadness is the most Arsenal fan move ever. +1 for consistency.