You really find TMP to be a funnier and better written show than NG?

As is the misguided belief that tipping these laborers will resolve the problem. What guarantee do we have that the manager who pays less than minimum wage doesn’t skim tips?

Yes there are...it’s just not funny, IMO.

Ratings?

You can demand political change, you can refuse to patronize salons that engage in this kind of fuckery. You say grand standing, I saw organize for change.

I posted that KONY video to my Facebook feed. What more do you want from me?

But I donate to UNICEF every year, and my white guilt tells me that makes everything else I do okay.

Not only did every member of his family capture the moment, they did it in landscape, as God intended.

Do they have jurisdiction over the Annunaki Police Department (APD) that was established in 5600 bc when the aliens who built the pyramids & accidentally sank Atlantis left earth? Or is there a friendly rivalry, firefighter vs. cop thing going on?

No, these badasses were the first.

I'm surprised the Saudi pilots recognized the runway...!

It says in Hebrew that a passenger had a medical problem

If a customer wants a waffle that’s griddled until theres no gluten, you griddle it until it has no gluten!

That white zinfandel story reminds me of something that happened at the first bar I ever worked.

These two dude bros straight up swagger up to the bar (which was fairly busy). Popped collar hamptonites with less money than they want you to assume they have. The one guy leans in over the bar and shouts “Lemme get a ZIN…

Sea level: It really does mean what you think it means.

“Now THAT’S White Zinfandel!” which he promptly poured into his monogrammed thermos.

What is it with sushi and stupid people? I was out to dinner this weekend at a very nice sushi place (the kind where they serve sushi and that’s it, no hibachi or noodle dishes or anything) and the two women at the table in front of us were absolute nitwits. They sat down, looked over the menu, and then started doing…

I just figured since the restaurant was called Tokyo, and the fact that the sign said “Japanese and hibachi,” it would have clued these college girls in on the fact that this wasn’t a Chinese restaurant.

I worked for a notoriously high-calorie, large-portion casual dining chain that specialized in having an obscene selection of cheesecakes on their dessert menu.