When your dog stands by your side when you're sick, it's because he loves you. When cat stands by your side when you're sick, it's because he's waiting for you to die so he can eat you. Ahhh, the Cat-Dog Wars are such a terrible thing.

Cats will eat their owner's face.

The earnestness of your argument is killing me.

That's because they aren't big enough...make em the size of panthers, lions, tigers, etc and they would probably rip the f#$k out of your face if the mood struck them right. Like a chimpanzee. As it stands felis familiaris will just eat your eyeballs out if you die at home and there isn't any food around. Some dogs…

Dogs have been bred to be affectionate. They are genuinely pleased when they please you. Have you never had a dog?

Cats are boring though. You don't take cats with you places because cats don't do shit.

I love this fight.

Cats typically just suck. That's why this is news. LOL