They aren’t variants. They are literally... NEW IPHONES.

Yeah. It’s literally a ten dollar connector, that you can FIND ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD! Good lord. It’s a headphone jack, and it’s days are numbers. Guess what? I have a ten dollar pair of bluetooth headphones, that are pretty damn fucking solid. You people, bitching and moaning about a headphone jack... move on. Lenovo…

Yeah, sorry, but Europeans do not get any movie featuring African Americans. Seriously. There is a reason why Michael Fassbender’s SLAVE MASTER, from 12 years a Slave, had his own poster. Europeans and Asian country, do not fucking get god damn fucking movies based around African American movies. Unless Will Smith is…

So... First Man looks great, but you know... FOOTBALL! Here’s hoping, that it’s in American cinemas long enough, for me to see it.

I have no idea why you AV club fucks are over here, but you can take your shit back to the Onion! Why the anger? HOW DARE YOU MALIGN A DENZEL WASHINGTON MOVIE! SHAME! SHAME!

Here’s to these racists fucks, getting to the World Series, and FUCKING LOSING AGAIN! Fuck you, and your racist logo, Cleveland!

They said that about christianity, and white people staying the majority in this country. Both have changed, and the NBA is the nation sport now. Why? It features diversity, a player favorable power structure, and stars you actually get to know on the court. The NFL, has decided, that the players are exchangeable,…

Hey Shep! You may not have gotten the fucking message, but Joss Whedon has been put out to pasture. Fuck him, and fuck buying this. Oh yeah, who did Joss fuck on this show? Jewel? Summer? Both? SEE SHEP? MOVED ON!

Hey Shep! You may not have gotten the fucking message, but Joss Whedon has been put out to pasture. Fuck him, and…

Could you be better? Maybe less anime avatars, that give away you like garbage? Is that possible? Okay? Okay. /s

Yeah. Targets entire promotion, has to do with Rey. It’s a lot better than last time, when you know... it was Ben Solo stinking up the joint.

No. I am not hanging onto these phones, as long as I can. The moment I can upgrade them... I can. That’s how it works. Also, seriously, it’s called a fucking mophie juice pack. It will take care of that battery anxiety for ya!

Let me be that guy: if two teams finish with the same record, and the first round pick is at stake. They go to strength of schedule, then other things. The NFL is fun.

No, you’re a piece of shit, that values property over people. That grocery store, is a write-off. It’s finished. Those people need food. It’s not like someone goes into a fucking grocery store, during historic flooding, and goes, “Man. I have to steal me some cheez-its.” Seriously, you need to get over being an…

You already didn’t vote enough in the last election, so you are killing the country. GOOD JOB!