I do take note of that, all the time. I even asked you how old you were, precisely because I take note of that. And divorce rates skyrocketed nationwide in the 70s.

lolololol this is a joke, right

I personally doubt he is because I think she would have named him as such because it would have made her look less “bad”.

1997, my mom a private pilot, my brother and I flew to a family reunion, from Seattle to Helena MT. We get there to find the entire family reunion had be relocated to a remote cabin. With no way to get there we hung out at my uncles house, and by out I mean outside in the yard until the family reunion returned the…

I got nothing. But one of my most treasured possessions is a postcard from when my two insane adult sisters got to go on vacation with my parents and I sat at home sulking. They filled up a postcard with chirpy passive aggressive “wish you were here having all the fun!” bs and gave it to my awesone dad to mail. It…

For me, I realize that the day isn’t actually about me and maybe I could suck up my social anxiety and personal feelings about the various people throwing the shower and go because it’s the polite thing to do.

My family does something similar for baby showers, but nowhere near as impersonal as this. Our family is pretty big, and in two years, my collected brothers and sisters in law brought 5 kids into the world. Needless to say, we got pretty burned out on baby showers. So, in the interest of the mom-to-be’s ease and…

Where is the “Give this comment ten stars button?” In this way a pool is like a boat or a plane.

Don’t hit your head against your deskscape—it’s not worth it, hon.

One of my favorite things about the Knot is that they refer to bridesmaids as BMs. I googled “who pays for a destination bachelorette” (seriously, do I have to pay for the bride’s vacation here?) and a bunch of people kept talking about how their “BMs paid for their bachelorette party.” I was like, man, some party, if…

Having just got married I did in fact delete every spreadsheet & list when we got home from our honeymoon. And damn it, it felt GOOD.

I used to work for the tabloids, so it’s not a question of if I have a story, but which one I tell the Jezzies.
There was the time Dave Navaro refused to be interviewed unless I gave him a blow-job. He had just married Carmen Electra.
There was the time on a red carpet that a very drunk Gary Busey asked me how, a…

made a burner account cos i had to tell this story:

a couple of years ago, a friend and i were WASTED at a bar for some coworker of hers’ birthday party. i didn’t know the person whose party it was (like i said, we were hammered), but we did manage to enough to notice kanye west and jay z among the attendees. the…

I went to see a screening of the second Boondock Saints film (for all its deep and obvious flaws, I have an abiding fondness for the original, entirely because of the gorgeous men and all the homoeroticism) that included a panel discussion with Troy Duffy and a few of the actors afterward. The move was so awful I…

One of the first texts I remember receiving from Mr. VonQueso: “I would hump the shit out of you.”

Thanks for the recommendation! I just bought the book - it looks like it’ll be very helpful.

I do not understand how people can lack the empathy to understand how this much sucks.

Who invited the party pooper???? Gettha getha getha getha getha.... get the hell outttta here!!!