When I worked in Tianjin, China, I would go to a steamed dumpling stall near my apartment, and all they made were pork dumplings (and they'd probably been doing it for decades), and they were so fucking good, and they had some insanely great pepper sauce on the side that I'll never remember the name of, and it was…

The best part is how Bond and Halle Berry are rolling around fucking on a pile of diamonds at the end. I know that we don't see Bond films for their strict adherence to logic, but they're literally having sex on top of the hardest, sharpest substance on earth! Amazing.

Yeah, there have been multiple articles about how, for all his status as firer-in-chief, Trump is actually a wuss who hates firing people. So he probably just wants them to resign.

Cheap bastards.

I have somehow managed to go my whole life meeting women who I was not romantically involved with, and yet still managed to avoid spontaneously trying to fuck/harass them for reasons I couldn't control. It's called not being mentally ill.

I do not. I should have asked my grandfather. I mean, it's highly possible that just most of his squandron was wiped out; I wasn't a stickler for details when I was five. What he did talk about, many times, but it was funny, was being at the canteen at base camp, and asking the cook for mashed potatoes, and the guy…

Hey! Pearl Harbor taught us all to love again, following the carnage of Pearl Harbor, which was redeemed by bombing Japan, or something.*

Jesus, I never got the "velvet" "Velveeta" connection before. I am dumb. Way dumb.

Heh, my grandfather was drafted into the Army in WWII, and then got measles (which was really dangerous at the time), and was sent home. My grandfather would have been the worst soldier of all time anyway, since he was a professor of medieval history who never even learrned to drive a car. ANY-hoo, his entire squad…

Yeah, a lot of people would just shoot their guns in the air, so they could at least prove that they fired their weapons. It's interesting, and, yes, heartening.

Canada just had to pay all the money to keep a fucking international bridge to America from collapsing, 'cause we didn't have the infrastructure funds to pay for any of it. …What a great fucking country we've created.

I've been to two of those cities. I say, let 'em crash.

DOWNVOTED?

FORGET HIM; HE'S GONE!!

I think Mr. Joss was responsible for like 5% of this movie, though, right? I've got no strong opinon on Joss — he seems… fine and sometimes very good — but I'd take any director over Zach.*

Okay, among a thousand other questions that I have about this trailer, why do they keep cutting to a television that's clearly from, like, 1975?

"What do people hate about it?" Because it makes it look exactly like the two terrible superhero movies that Zack did before this one. Not that he's ever made a good movie, but I'd wager that's what people don't like.*

Dear god, this looks so terrible and Zach Snyder-y. Slow-mo. Excessive bombast. Ugh, no way.

…And if we currently didn't live in a dark alternative-universe timeline, I'm sure that would be the case.

SORRY THAT OUR LIBERAL JOKEY-JOKES MADE YOU SAD, SEAN. …Clearly, he should not have been criticized in any way. We all can see that now.