My grandmother used to tell a story about quitting smoking. She was ready to quit, and found herself in church praying about it. She swears she heard a voice say “tell no man!” So she went home, swore to not tell anyone that she was quitting, and went on with her business. She never smoked another cigarette in her…

The old “all of these new people took over my gym, at least they’ll be gone in a week!” post has to be the single most obnoxious humble brag in common use.

No, the vasectomy (a) isn’t that bad, and (b) should be reserved for three consecutive days when you actually do want to sit around with frozen peas on your sack watching sports. My wife sold me on getting one during the World Cup two years ago. Three days to watch awesome soccer and no future possibilities of…

Yes, he seems to be taking this news just fine...

Agreed.

Agreed.

Agreed.

That would kill me. Every time she started a new show, I’d be imagining the guy she’s totally watching it with.

I actually like the First Noel, but if you take away the sentimental ties that many of us have to it, it kind of sucks as a song. First of all, it’s got an incredibly dull and repetitive tune. Go ahead, hum a few bars. Sounds like a guy who just learned to play a major scale on a piano screwing around, right? And then…

D.L. Blair.

Isn’t Blair, Nebraska where you used to have to send in post cards to enter Nickelodeon contests? I remember being instructed to send something there, and that seems as likely as anything.

The SBA isn’t exactly a small business anti regulation outfit. They provide loans to small business. And they run this program where business that qualify as minority, female, or veteran owned in certain under-served areas get priority for minor government contracts- janitorial and catering services in federal…

I was pretty close to getting a job with the SBA this summer. Long process with unhelpful and unorganized leadership that left me pretty bitter about the process in the end. Anyway, I either dodged a huge bullet, or I’m going to miss out on four years of observing the insanity on the inside.

That’s kind of like critiquing someone for not pronouncing Chow Mein in proper Cantonese. Queso may have a Spanish name and distant roots in actual Mexican food, but it’s an American dish at this point, and it’s just pronounced kay-so, regardless of how they would say it south of the border.

There was probably a little fat that could have been trimmed from the opening, but I liked the slow build of bad decision after bad decision, leading to the protagonist almost getting out of there, and then blowing it. Overall, pretty solid.  

While I can’t say that I remember a specific animal or vegitable sex scene, as soon as I saw that, I figured it must be a reference to something from Robertson Davies. I always enjoyed his books, but the man put some really fucked up stuff in there.

Firing someone from half of their job but keeping them on board to do the other half is generally a terrible idea. I know this from experience. In my first job out of college, I was an interim hire, and they kept me on in a diminished capacity for a few months after they hired my replacement. It was beyond…

Poorly.

Good for him. The thing about international soccer is that you are at the mercy of where and when you were born. You can be one of the greatest players of your generation, but if you happen to be born in a smaller country or outside of a golden generation, your chances of winning an international trophy are pretty…

I do think that the superstar factor is less present in soccer than it is in, say, basketball. You really need to have a bunch of skilled players come up at the same time and get on board the same system. Which tends to happen a lot with Brazil, Germany, and Italy. Just to cherry pick two of your one superstar teams,…