When I was about six years old, my parents gave me my own TV, complete with cable hook up. I was also raised in a bedtime-free house (don't worry, I'm still bad at going to sleep at a reasonable hour and waking up on time). We also didn't have rating restrictions on what we watched — I was taught at a young age that…

That's how I got out of my last relationship.

I can't applaud your use of Egg and "Not today, Satan" enough.

My mom gave me the "brush it or cut it" option when I was 5 or 6. I cut it... pixie short. Our lives were immensely easier after that. When it grew back, I was older and much more self-aware and didn't care about the brushing.

If you're 18 and dating another 18 year old frat boy douche or something, then maybe you can assume he's sleeping around until he makes it "official", but otherwise... disregard.

The visual of a ghostly MoH at a hotel bar during a destination wedding is so glorious. I just imagine a lot of duckface and piña coladas...

I know some folk who worked on that show and it is apparently hilarious. Can't wait for it to come out.

When I was a kid (maybe 4 or 5), my older brother took it upon himself to teach me the fine art of baseball, America's pastime. We found a place in the backyard that was a safe area to swing a bat. My brother, ever the pragmatist, told me to step far away from him so he could show me how to swing. As he was swinging…

That was the "OH SHIT" moment of realization I had after a serious relationship. 6+ years (during which we didn't use condoms because MONOGAMY!) and when we broke up, I found out he banged half of the neighborhood. I've never felt so lucky to have a clean bill of health in my life. A good friend of mine had a similar…

That was the "OH SHIT" moment of realization I had after a serious relationship. 6+ years (during which we didn't use condoms because MONOGAMY!) and when we broke up, I found out he banged half of the neighborhood. I've never felt so lucky to have a clean bill of health in my life. A good friend of mine had a similar…

This. All of this.

I wrote a letter to Robert Englund (Freddy Krueger) complimenting him for being my favorite horror movie star (I was 7 or 8. My upbringing was questionable).

Having worked in business and legal affairs at a film production company, I can confidently say this is standard. It's based on the SAG voiceover day rate. Actors who are unknown and doing a very small part aren't going to negotiate for a chunk of the backend.

Carmen Sandiego is super sexy. All mysterious and whatnot.

I thought all alcohol needed a juice mixer when I was a kid...

Wow. Just... wow.

This exists, if you (but not really you) want to kind-of-pretend-to-wear-Cher's-clothing.

This detail is perfect.

Cher's red dress from the valley party in Clueless. I'd take the jacket and the shoes, too (couldn't find a great image of the whole outfit), but LOVE that dress.

I force myself to sit down and evaluate everything that I think is "going wrong" in my life. Then, I break it down into smaller parts and do one thing at a time. Like, I find that when I'm in a rut, I'll stop maintaining my space (won't make the bed, won't clean the floors, whatever) and that chaos actually…