He, alone, is stronger than any of them will ever, ever be, as individuals or the mob they innately seek to become.

I’m no psychologist, but that kid that just kept staring at him is definitely a sociopath.

Ants, live, a whole left over sodas' worth. I was about 13. So much shrieking and vomiting ensued. 100s of ants... And it was more the sensensation of the live ants desperately trying to climb out of my through and mouth that kept my gag reflex active for hours days weeks...

but her e-meals

You don’t get it, though. You critiqued it as a satire on feminism in general, when it’s actually attacking a short-sighted flimsy application of “feminism”, not just in that Post article but any time it’s suggested we celebrate “strong women” like Gina Haspel and Megan Kelly for getting ahead in a man’s world while…

I love Cannibal Witch because she pisses off the libtards. No, I don’t like her policy on rounding up all of our children to be eaten, but she owns the lib snowflakes so hard. They all cry and scream about their children being eaten, and I just laugh at their ridiculous faux outrage.

Why, though? They provide the context in the post. It’s clear what this is making fun of-beyond the fact that literally every Cannibal Witch post is a specific callout of some other idiotic thinkpiece. I’m struggling to see why this specific one is a Jezebel problem and not a you problem.

“I don’t get it” would’ve taken a lot less time to type.

I mean, there’s a link to the article right in the middle of the post. And it’s in keeping with the standard Jez thing of being snarky about something that you probably haven’t heard about, in a way that is confusing out of context. Have you perhaps not been on Jezebel very long?

I read this not as satire of feminism but as satire of the Rosenberg Washington Post piece—that excusing an abhorrent position (child eating or anti-LGBTQ “morality clauses” in an employment contract) by saying “hey, but it’s great that a woman is doing something modern and non-traditional!” is ridiculous.

Three sentences... on point. It’s not about being young or cool, it’s about advocating for progressive and democratic ideals. You want to get a following? Stand up for your constituents, show your passionate about making things better, and support good ideas and not more Washington cronyism.

People don’t like AOC because she tweets about Cardi B. They like AOC because she tweets about taxing rich people at 70% to fix real problems in the world.   Centrist Democrats are desperately trying to ignore that part of her popularity.  

God I hate the whole Iowa thing. Can we drop that shit already? It’s archaic and dumb. The Steve King state has done nothing to deserve this attention.

“a dumb Stacey Dash”

Get out your hatchets, everyone, she wants to bring back the WCTU! It’s the second coming of Carrie Nation.

What more of this viral spectacle do we need to consume?

He gives me feelings in places.  Big Boi does not. 

8 or more.

He’s gonna end the shutdown when he can’t fucking stand it and wants to golf again. The shutdown is going to end, and his orange ass is going to be at Mar-a-Lago before shit’s fully up and running. 

I thought it was “The Lady in White” that everyone’s hometown had.