I imagine that I'm a guest on Craig Ferguson's show and he falls all in crush with me but we're both faithful so our mutual crushiness has to go unrequited. He also admires my work as a middle aged actress playing a sassy maid on a wonderful sitcom. WTF?

I've also heard of using Fels Naptha laundry bar soap for wasp stings. I know most people probably don't own this soap nowadays, let alone probably never heard of it but I remember my grandmother telling me she used this after getting stung by a wasp while hanging out laundry. She swore that the swelling went down…

Had algebra 1 freshman year of high school and a nun for a teacher. She was the most pinched woman and it never occurred to me to ask her for help. Had a tutor and algebra just went over my head and with the family situation I had at the time I really don't know how I got as far as I did in school. The nun even told…

I did something similar before we bought a reverse osmosis filter system. I would leave a glass of water on the window sill by the kitchen sink. It would have no chlorine taste by morning.

When I was a little girl in the early sixties, there was an Imperial Margarine commercial where upon biting into toast you were suddenly wearing a crown. I wanted that crown soooo much and would beg my mom to buy that margarine. She grew up on butter and wouldn't buy that plastic fat crap and I was heartbroken with…

Yeah, I love how we're supposed to be so insufferable a few days out of the month but men can think with their dicks 24/7 and we're the emotional ones?

Just put a cotton ball in the empty canister.

Aldi's is all over the Toledo, Oh area-some poor some suburban. They have fantastic produce for great prices and I love reading the sales fliers for the non-grocery items.

I couldn't take my eyes of that spunky little elf-girl.

Yeah, I always use a natural bristle brush for latex paints. The paint store people always try to tell me I'm making a mistake but that's what I learned to paint with from a professional. The bristles hold paint better and it's easier to cut into ceilings with.

I use a used dryer sheet or a piece of newspaper. I use the net onion bags for napkins and paper towels that have some life in them yet to clean up things spilled on the kitchen floor or for cat throw up. I keep the bag under the kitchen sink attached to the cupboard door for easy access.

Love those.

Farberware percolator that's so old it says, "Bronx, N.Y." on the bottom. All stainless steel and had to have the warming and heating elements changed but other than that it makes piping hot coffee and stops perking automatically. If anyone is curious about percolated coffee, don't use the drip grind stuff out of a…

Is this a percolator or a "cowboy coffee" maker? We perc in the colder months since it stays hotter longer.

I use a cleaner called "Awesome" and it's cheap. It comes in a pump spray bottle and you can buy it at Walmart or Dollar General. I've never seen it at other grocery stores. It even cleaned the outside of my 10 year old Weber grill to almost-new-looking-ness.

We always thought Trojans felt like visqueen plastic. You know, the stuff they stable over windows in the winter? Crown brand was our favorite. I think it was called Skin Less Skin or something like that. There's a site called Condom Depot that takes Paypal and their selection is cool and they have sampler packs. I…

I hate being called girl or when I'm with friends, who are also in their mid fifties, girls. Is it because I'm short? Hate it from guys. Hate it from women. The sweetie thing and other "terms of endearment" really depended on who said them and how it was said. When you have worked service or retail jobs you can tell…

Sorry-put them in the drawer.

Got this tip from my aunt: buy a couple of dozen quilt size safety pins and when you take your socks off, pin them together and throw in with rest of dirty clothes pile. You wash them and dry them with the safety pins and sorting is easy-peasy. I put them in the draw pinned together and throw the pins into a small jar…

Look, I'm 53. I don't "feel" 53 inside-I think most people stay youngish inside and feel the age physically. BUT I'll be the first person in the room to tell my age and I'm a woman. Listen to your gut. Many times I didn't and it just turns out to be time that you wasted. You'll be middle aged before you know it, so…