There's that common joke about Twilight, about how there's no plot until the last 20% or so. Well, Fifty Shades manages to have no plot at all, for the entire first book.

The worst part about the lip biting thing is that it legitimately used to be a habit of mine when I was thinking—but I broke myself of the habit because I wanted in no way to be associated with Fifty Shades in any way. Every time I did it, all I could think was "YOU'RE ACTING LIKE ANASTASIA! DO YOU WANT TO BE LIKE…

Ooh, ooh, did you like the epilogue a couple years on, in which Ana's interaction WITH HER CHILD is described using LITERALLY THE SAME PHRASING used in half the sex scenes?

Only special magic rays blessed by a rabbi will do, and for maximum effectiveness, the rabbi should be at least 50 years of age, speak Russian, and enjoy mystery novels.

The second book just plain confused me at first. I actually thought I'd picked up the third book by mistake.

Blue star, at least. :)

Unfortunately...

Frank did straight-up absolve her of an affair during the war, after all. Sure, Claire got pissed at the suggestion, but she's got to be keeping that in mind.

The idea of such fanfic makes me feel sick to my stomach, honestly... ack. Some people simply should not get the Draco in Leather Pants treatment.

I'm kinda especially prejudiced against Frank at the moment because I'm rereading the books and I forgot about some of his opinions on... people.

Oh, hmm, I wasn't thinking nearly that early. I was figuring [SPOILERS, obviously] either when she's accused of witchcraft or when Jamie takes her back to the stones and she makes her decision. But there's sooo much to go before those bits, even if they skip over the whole beating part.

Yesss, it is very important.

Doesn't it also tie into ownership of Lallybroch? I kinda forget how that whole thing goes, but I thought that was part of it.

I'm really curious where they'll break it... there's two possibilities I can think of, but either one would need them to make up a LOT of ground in the next two episodes.

With that look of "Shut up, Claire."

I am so of two minds about this episode... on one hand, I straight up could not watch most of the episode, it was just too awful (when Jamie and Jack are slipping in Jamie's blood... ugh!). On the other hand, the last ten seconds were amazing and just what I wanted and why isn't it next week already.

Judging by the preview for next week... you won't need to write that letter.

It's this theoretical idea about only eating "primitive" foods from the Paleolithic period or something. So pre-agriculture, pre-domesticated animals. I think it's based on some idea that humans are perfectly evolved to digest those sorts of foods (and for some unexplained reason, apparently our digestive systems just…

I'm not saying they should patch them, I'm saying that I have the right to complain about them, and that games in the future should be better about it.

Wow. Your unassailable logic has convinced me. Congratulations.