I swear to all the pretend, invisible men in the sky... if this 'war on Christmas' and 'it's Merry Christmas, not Happy Holidays' shit happens again this year, I think I might will myself to implode.

This made me sob.

This thread has provided me with many laughs today. Thank you for making it :)

I think humans need to go extinct. We are one of the worst parasites this Universe has probably ever seen. I'm rooting for a meteor!

But you didn't stamp it with no erasies!!!

When I was 18, my aunt was dying of Cancer. My family didn't want to talk about it, so in an effort to show my support and solidarity without speaking, I shaved my head bald and donated my hair.

I'm not sure if this was intended to be funny or not, but either way, this cracked me up. Well done :)

Ok... can someone explain this to me?

Wow... I feel like this was all kinds of bad advice.

Hmmm...

I am :)

It's true.

Woah...

Ironically, my focus in University (Psychology) has helped me understand her in a lot of ways. Projection, insecurities, etc. etc.

Yep. Working on my Phd in Psychology... AND I went to college too.

Oh, and in case anyone was wondering, I am currently pursuing my Phd in Psychology.

Poisonous friends are the worst.

Here she is:

That translates to me as:

Not true in my relationship. Mr. Trickius is the slowest fucking walker on this earth, and it drives me absolutely batty. Often times, I am walking a mile ahead of him, and/or badgering him to hurry-the-fuck-up.