I’m basically the little girl in the yellow shirt right now.

New nee new nee new.

That’s how I say his name whenever I have to say his name.

Because they occasionally get more than just the tips?

Where’s one of those stretchy snap ‘n’ grab hands when you need one? I wonder if they’re still A Thing in those crappy toy vending machines.

DOES ANYONE HAVE A SELFIE STICK AND SOME GUM?! QUICKLY NOW!

Those two sharing a gyro in a gyrocopter would be spectacular.

They’re so pointy

Do you know about the early days of the Kimberly Diamond mines? Do you know what they did to the native workers who stole diamonds?

Mary Mitchell essentially argued that sex workers cannot be raped.

It’s like slow motion. You see it and for a split second think “there’s no way”, but then you realize there IS TOTALLY a way and it’s happening. Boo hiss for that dollar bill fuckery.

Or a musical review put on by senior citizens.

I chose... Wisely.

Isn’t that one of the worst feelings? Seeing something fall and realizing it’s actually gonna go into that impossibly small opening, and you know you won’t be able to get it out.

Goo is always ew. Public pubic goo is doubly extra eew.

Yes. Huge outdoor concerts and pretty much any Ribfest is guaranteed to have a few heavy Johnnie On The Spots by mid afternoon.

I always tell MrGhostBoobs to “go eat a potato” whenever he has one of his leg cramps. One of these days I’m going to hand him a box of powdered mashed potato flakes a straw and tell him to “go snort some potato” =)

Dryhumping in public is a short sighted venture on the males part.