I'M SHOCKED THAT YOU WOULD SAY SUCH A THING.

Yes, after the whole sex abuse scandal with the guy who does Elmo's voice, Sesame Street pulled way back on the Elmo-promoting and started featuring other Muppets more prominently. Thank Christ.

No way I'm watching this before my morning coffee or my evening bottle of wine.

Lets put everyone from Portland, Oregon under quarantine because someone from Portland, Maine coughed.

You are reading a judgement that I promise isn't there.

Could these motherfuckers be any more gorgeous?

"I'm only 45. My dong is great." - Thomas Jane

Shailene Woodley was born in 1991. Thomas Jane was born in 1969.

This is almost as bad as the time that neocon shitlord Elvis wrote Viva Las Vegas, which thoughtlessly celebrated the city and totally failed to address its high divorce rates, unstable housing market and contribution to gambling addiction.

One of the biggest misconceptions about feminism is that women have to blindly support each other. Taylor seems like a lovely person but she's not above critique.

Same value as freezing for medical reasons. Medical reasons is basically you're going into chemo and you have it on the doctor's authority that your eggs will be no good after that. For non-medical reasons you're just saying you anticipate waiting until you're older to have kids, so you're hedging against the fact…

Haven't seen any bugs yet so...

I know it seems like you only see them in Lifetime movies when some loving husband brings his wife breakfast in bed (note: this is always a sign that at least one of them are about to die horrifically, probably murdered by the other), but bed trays are cheap, easier to carry food and to eat off of, and solve problems…

Shit.

I don't eat in bed. Nope, not me.

You're that school's principle, aren't you?

This was in a textbook, you guys. Not a Chive article. A TEXTBOOK.

My sexual education teacher was horrible. He said to me, "...you shouldn't be out in the open with your sexuality. It makes others uncomfortable, and makes you look like a target and a victim." He said that transgender people and bisexuals "...do not exist, they're doing it for attention." He also said that "...it…

motion to include "sweater puppies"