I have had the most miserable 6 weeks dealing with a break up, and an infestation of bed bugs in my apartment. I have no idea why, but the fact that you received the sexy carps and ladies calendar, again, fucking delights me.

I Yet Again Was Not Asked to Model for This Erotic Carp Calendar, But I Was Sent One

I’ve never heard of this before but now I must have one. I guess that’s carpitalism for you.

Wait a minute! Janet Jackson isn’t in the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame?

I’m guessing she votes Republican. And complains about moochers on welfare and “illegals.”

DUDE WE LIVE NEARBY THEN, RIGHT?

Obamaphone! I never heard of it until this summer. Turns out its funded by telecom companies and the government has nothing to do with it. It started during the Reagan administration for landlines and in 2008 expanded to include cell phones.

Is this, like, a genetic difference between conservatives and liberals? This was my first thought too. That’s not easy money to live on but most conservatives I know would have immediately said “Lazy bitch, living off the government”.

Oh, come on. That’s not true at all. I lived there for 10 years, and they’re fantastic with racism.

That poor tree. Killed to make about the ugliest Christmas Tree ever.

Could anything be more representative of the next four years?

I’d rather spend that $900 of taxpayer money for her to have three squares in prison, y’know? Possibly it’d be a step up from her living standard right now.

They’re assholes farting into their own echo chamber, then getting upset by the smell.

Crusader against The Government and its evil hoaxes has been living off of Social Security since 2004.

People are the actual worst.

The ornaments were made in China, I guarantee it.

Looks like shit is that what Christmas trees look like in Alabama

Hey, I know people keep calling this guy Elite, but he gets into all sorts of trouble when he gets out of the pocket.

RE: HIPAA violations. Medical personnel, please don’t do things like that. Celebrities have the same protection of their personal health information just like everyone else.