Whenever they resign on day one of the scandal...it’s because there’s something REAL freaky going on there.

I would never, ever, advocate the chucking of like five shoes at the president in quick succession just so he could take all of them to the face and then immediately brag he has great reflexes, just the best reflexes.

You’re a conservative and you read Vox? Are you a unicorn?

George W. Bush was president for EIGHT YEARS. Guarantee he tried at least two of these. Would’ve been more, but the secret service guys got quicker.

I know this is neither here nor there, but he really does have the worst fucking advance people. Why is Mike Pence lurking back there looking like trump balanced his disembodied head on his shoulder?

Seriously, how many years out are we from the day football is only played in Vegas, like it’s a UFC fight or a boxing match?

I am HERE for no-fucks-to-give John Oliver and would like for him to interview all of the people.

I like Jimmy Kimmel and think he’s been great this year, but...ugh. Again?

Gonna be real fun in like 4 years when Trump’s out of the WH and congressional Republicans still have to deal with whatever insanity twice-removed-from-the-bench Roy Moore is putting out there on a regular basis.

Counterpoint: he is a relentless garbage monster

God, I wish. If it were Schur’s world, we’d have like 90% less Trump (although given his love for Infinite Jest, probably like 30% more ponderous tennis academy takes).

Trump talks about sex like a high-school sophomore who has never had any but is trying to convince the other guys on the JV basketball team he has a girlfriend but she goes to a different school but they’ve totally done it. “There’s nothing like...um...really great...boobs. And pussy. Just...first rate pussy, guys.…

This is a setup. If Moore clearly and unequivocally calls Corfman a liar in response, she has a slam-dunk libel case (and all the attendant discovery, testimony under oath, etc. that implicates). If he doesn’t, he’s tacitly admitting the allegations. It’s a good move. If Moore wins this will haunt the Republican party…

Man, the Murder, She Wrote reboot is gonna be WEIRD.

We all have a job to do in the upside down.

Oh no! Not a show I had no idea existed until just now!

Oh, I don’t think he’d be a decent human being, I just think it’d give everyone a chance to jump in and get him the hell off the stage before he could do more damage.

Fucking reporting, how does it work?

Dude, the fact that there is not a designated staffer with the sole task of faking a heart attack every time the President starts his remarks with “I’m not going to read the prepared speech” is just a failure of leadership at this point.

Just fucking resign, dude. There are plenty of progressive women in Minnesota that could be appointed to replace you, many of whom could benefit from a national profile as we get toward 2020. I liked you, but it’s time to go.