I could only read half of his Wikipedia page before feeling nauseous. Absolutely horrifying knowing he got away alive without an ounce of guilt.

Not even a “smize!”

Because their rule: God 1st, husband 2nd, children last. It’s more important for Mom to clean and cook dinner for the husband than entertain the baby!

What a perfect way to raise a child who won’t fight back from a molester!

Any chance I get to post Kid Farm... (check out the whole series! my intro to Pete Holmes years ago)

The only cutters at my high school were some anorexic girls on the cross country team. I was completely goth, but black lipstick and sad poetry was my jam.

The character is based on Ed Gein, who made a female skin suit and several masks.

Have you seen Funny or Die’s Jared & Ivanka videos? Enjoyable!

My husband works in building owned by this landlord. From her past odd behaviors and rambling emails, I honestly think she’s a certified coo coo head. I’m not sure how she came into money, but it wasn’t from having a sound mind for business.

I have a long torso and have to go up one size just to get the length right - then I eat more food to fill it out accordingly.

Prana or Patagonia swimwear forever. Actually made for swimming!

Parents will take their children to any crap kids flick* that comes out. Why? Dark room with snacks AND I can take a nap. Worth every penny.

Way back when people weren’t frightened and offended by serenading.

This filter is making it harder for me to find her jewelry.  

I’m pleased to inform you that a short fur coat is called a “chubby.” You’re welcome.

She saved so much money by taking Uber rather than an ambulance. 

At first I was like, “lame Chris Martin,” then I was like, “oh yeah, I’m gonna have a roller skating 40th.”

You’re right! Worst example ever. Guess I haven’t seen it since I was a kid.