Hey, I’ve got Todd Gurley on my fantasy team, and he—what? The fantasy season’s over?

Making your house less attractive is the best deterrent. If a thief wants to get in, your lock isn’t going to stop them.

I’m not “wrong” about anything. I’m lamenting that my five-dollar cheap thermometer isn’t as good as a $95 thermometer that folks like Alton recommend. If you thought I was saying that my cheap one is as good as the expensive one, I think you misread my comment because that’s not what it says.

On the contrary, the world is a better place for knowing that you’ll get your panties in a twist over what some anonymous person on the internet has to say about a subject that does not directly affect you in any way whatsoever. Now we know not to care about anything you’ve got to say because you’re a humorless twat.

My sarcasm and negativity is more valuable than their bullshit.

There’s only one historic bridge in the US, why should they bother telling you where it is? YOU SHOULD ALREADY KNOW.

Except that’s not what the rule says or what the commenter is commenting on. The rule doesn’t differentiate between sex with a lifelong partner or a raft of strangers. Sex with any man at all within 12 months disqualifies you.

Uh huh. Well I don’t care that commenters don’t care that the media doesn’t care that Peyton doesn’t - wait, no. I don’t care that commenters don’t care about players who don’t care about - no, that’s not right.

A representative was quoted as saying, “We’ll take gay blood now, just as long as the gays in question aren’t gaying it up on the regular. I mean, that’s fair, right? After a year, gay blood is just as good as straight blood.”

Saying “we” signed to a team is like a guy saying “we” are pregnant.

You can still do quite a lot with no arms.

What makes you think you have a slim chance? The government can escalate. You can’t. Doesn’t matter what you’ve got or how many, the government has more people and better weapons. If they want you, they will get you.

Opening the floodgates of commenters who are utterly convinced they know everything about everything about food - and are more than happy to lay it on ya - in 3... 2... 1...

It’s adorable that you think your gun will protect you from the government.

I’ve tried a few times to do this - even bought one of those special rectangular pans - but I just can’t. It doesn’t roll right, it breaks, it overcooks... I’m in awe of anyone that can pull it off and make it look as amazing as it does in that picture.

You skipped floors? Were you in a TARDIS?

And then consider how much of that goes to Gawker in the form of an affiliate commission.

And then consider how much of that goes to Gawker in the form of an affiliate commission.

Ten million in three years. That’s impressive! Go readers!

Ten million in three years. That’s impressive! Go readers!

Shane, is that ten million products in all, or ten million just this year? It can’t possibly be just this year... right?

Shane, is that ten million products in all, or ten million just this year? It can’t possibly be just this year...…

No, you just came off like a pompous asshat. If you’re cool with that, you just keep doing you.

No, you just came off like a pompous asshat. If you’re cool with that, you just keep doing you.