Good. The Cleveland Browns with a winning record is a crime against God, man, and nature.

The one thing Deadspin and ESPN agree on: Johnny Manziel hype.

I really think he'd do well to cut the "money" signs until he actually produces some NFL-level wins. But of course he won't, because he's an entitled asshole.

No player in the NFL will have a bigger target on his head than Manziel. Dude is going to get RGIII'd.

That money sign thing he does makes me want to see him get sacked, often. Now, if you'll excuse me, there are a bunch of kids on my damn lawn.

If this is how Manziel bounces back from a pregame fistfight, just wait until he becomes an alleged accessory to homicide.

Right now in Bristol, they are salivating. They can't wait to say Johnny Football at least five times for each broadcast. And, oh, Jon Gruden just wet his pants in delight.

Jay Cutler: "Nice autism kid Ryan Fitzpatrick has. I guess he didn't love his child enough to not get him vaccinated. Now who wants to see my kid do an awesome wheelie in his polio chair?"

Fitzpatrick: Bryan, give me two numbers from the 90s and Brady's going to multiply them together.

Looking forward to Manziel's career basically mirroring RG3's at some point. i.e. injury after injury with diminishing play.

Another guy who I will hate while everyone else loves. C'mon fellow haters where you at?

If this story is true, Still has managed to not only con Smythe, but a great number of NFL fans.

Please oh please let RG3 end up with St. Louis and emerge as their franchise quarterback. This is what Dan Snyder deserves more than anything else.

Finally they recognize Skyline chili for what it is!

Where did you learn to wrench? I wish I could do all this stuff myself...

Right so let's all skip class WOOOO! This is stupid, skipping classes is wrong and kids should be punished in some way for not participating in a class. I think we'd all have a different view if a child was like "you know I just don't feel like maths today".

This guy is terrible and did something awful to one of his…

I was assaulted by three PE teachers over the years. I'm very very petite and was much more so as a child (as an adult, there's lots of tiny people! In a class of less than 130, not so much). I also have a EDS, which was undiagnosed at the time but I had lots of pain and doctors' notes confirming there was some…

All those goddamn banana pancakes and mud football practices ain't cheap.