crediting yourself in an apology is classy AF

Was anyone else one of those uber-sensitive kids who ascribed feelings to their toys and stuffed animals? I used to play with all of my toys on a rotation because I was afraid of hurting their feelings. I kind of did that with my clothes too - I would feel guilty if I didn't wear my red shirt for a while because I was…

As a seven year old, I raided the kitchen for my art supplies. I took some herbs, green food coloring, lemon juice, and turmeric powder to create this. My dad was so angry at me for destroying the kitchen and geting half the spice cabinet all over the floor, but he took this, and he framed it because he thought it was…

I was 8 years old when I went into my parent's bedroom one morning while my parents were still asleep and saw my Dad had a boner. I totally freaked out, woke my Mom up by dragging her out of the bed, and called 911 because I thought it was a chestburster from Aliens.

Ugh ugh ugh I know.

Are we gonna talk about the bit where Kanye approved of Tyga "getting in early" with Kylie?

man think with their dick first, but

Absolutely. Kanye has a daughter of his own and still thinks Tyga is "smart to get in early"? That's really fucked up.

See this is the dumb shit.

Thanks Obama! #sarc

We'll just have to agree to disagree. Kanye is awful.

she was such a whore I had to shower for year to cleanse myself. I totally did it though- but she's the whore. Bc I had reasons- like this other woman I was totally into wasn't into me at the time. So I'm better. And totally not a whore.

I had no idea you had such a deep and intimate knowledge of Kanye's dating history.

Yeah...No. I'm black and I've heard this (valid) argument used in invalid ways. Using it in this instance is definitely invalid. This dude called out his ex girlfriend who HE cheated on a whore and then went on to joke about statutory rape. Sorry. This isn't a "we don't want the black man to speak the truth" type…

I know but...Emma Watson deserves so much better than Prince Harry.

Yes, because that's clearly what I'm saying *blinks*

LOL what? Sorry, black men don't get a pass at sexism cause they're black.

I had to take off my #teamkanye jersey for that one. That's some gross slut-shaming 'Ye. Also, "getting in early" with a 17 year old girl is not funny. It's gross and illegal in most states.

"By the way, it's very hard for a woman to want to be [with a man] who's been with Amber Rose. You know what I'm saying? I had to take 30 showers before I got with Kim."

Yes, you asshole, we know what you're saying.

My head might explode if Hermione becomes a princess.