the ocean is fucked up

I made it to 1:07 and I feel like I deserve some kind of reward for that.

“Let me know if I can fuck with you, boy” is easily one of the worst lyrics I’ve ever heard. It’s probably supposed to sound cheeky or sexy or something, but it comes off more as menacing. Like, “I’m going to psychologically abuse and manipulate you and you’re going to like it.”

OK. Listen. I know everyone (except Yetta and Tallblonde) is going to pop in here talking about how you’re not falling in love with Harry. You’re going to list all sorts of reasons. On one hand, count yourself lucky not to have become ensorcelled by this alien in his inescapable web of fascination and dimples.…

I know its supposed to be pronounced “fire”, but i keep reading it as “fry”. Then i get confused/hopeful that this was a french fry festival and wonder how they would fuck that up.

Yeah, I’m sure you’re going to “take care” of pre-existing conditions so that soon, my insurance company won’t cover mine anymore, you fucking nightmare.

Dude what? You know that hospitals aren’t in charge of names, right? Jesus fucking Christ.

I wouldn’t want to be stuck in an airport with a bunch of pissed off lifestyle bloggers, that’s for damn sure.

I probably wouldn’t talk to Caitlyn either if I was Khloé.

Thoughts and prayers are with you! I almost died when I was born too but I turned out okay. Babies get sick sometimes, but it sounds like yours is well on her way to recovery. One day, this will just be a story for you tell her when she needs to be reminded how strong she is. Thinking of you both!

This time I’m make a mental effort to forget the perpetrator’s name and remember the victim’s.

It is still not clear to the family how Malachi got his hands on the dangerous weapon. Stephens said that he got the gun from a friend who got it from someone else. Investigators are looking into finding out who originally had the gun and passed it to the friend, the news station notes.

All these years of him trying to shock and awe us. And all it would have taken was a smile.

Nothing quite like Won the Lawsuit from Phoenix Wright. Such a pervasive feeling of relief!