One Christmas in my early twenties my mother burst into tears and told me I was “Teetering on the edge of obesity!” She only proceeded to get more upset when my sister burst into hysterical laughter and my father (NOT a man who is shy about the fat-shaming) told her she was being “silly.” In truth, I probably did not…

Yeah it’s funny because I was never a fan of small/lap dogs, but the more I’m around them the more I see the appeal. They are just as doggy as other dogs, but in an ultra-convenient size! Chis in particular have this funny prancing walk that kills me.

It is upsetting. I mentioned downthread that there’s an obese chihuahua in our local shelter atm. Chis are really popular around here and even the older ones are usually gone within in a week- this guy has been there almost a month. In some ways it’s good because the shelter staff are very knowledgable and he’ll…

He reminds me of this guy. So debonair!

It’s not as difficult as you’d think. With our old dog (who was part beagle, therefore VERY food motivated) we’d put half her food in her bowl in the morning before we went to work, and then she got the rest when we sat down to dinner. There are helpful little charts on the back of the dog food bags that tell you how…

Same. I hadn’t really given it much thought, and then the person issuing our marriage license asked if we were changing our names, and I was all “Uhrrrrr, I don’t know...do you care?” and my husband was all “Could not possibly care less” and so I kept it. My last name is pretty cool and has worked out okay for almost…

This was immediately what I assumed, because it has the word “Papa’s” in the name and many, many people do not believe in reading the whole damn title before you go ahead and make a scene.

Down With Love is my ultimate sick-day movie. It’s pretty and silly and just smart enough to keep me awake through the flu meds. And I like to wrap my head in a towel and pretend it’s a chic turban.

The legend of the first person who ran a marathon holds that he collapsed and died having finished his historic run.

Hair weight and density is important too. I have straight hair and I look great with bangs (also giant forehead), but to get them I have to essentially take 1/3 of the hair on my head right to the front. Unless it’s a pixie, in which case a wispy short fringe becomes an asset.

I know right? This sounds even more severe than the usual “Women should have long hair because that’s what I like because I’m unimaginative!” rants- what a boring world this person must inhabit.

My first job was working for a bargain retail store (think Dollar Tree) that had just opened up in a store in our town that had been empty for about a year. The first day we opened was like a horror movie collided with the battle of the Somme, and my favorite part of it was being yelled at 30 minutes after opening by…

That caught my attention, too. I didn’t actually do too many extra-curriculars as a child, but the ones I did where never with my parents attending. What exactely are the ramifications of her children possibly seeing her not paying attention to soccor practice? Will they really be so crushed by the notion that not…

On the one hand, this is absurdly horrible. On the other hand, he’s the only Republican candidate who’s actually being upfront about the political right’s mentality toward these crimes. Let’s be honest, school shootings are now pretty banal in terms of the national stage. 45 this year alone! They’re practically a…

Yeah, I agree with others about giving them a list of things you’ve either already paid for or already budgeted for. Paid for is best, because then if they decide to pull the old “We saw X but thought you might want to go with Y because I can get it for 1/3 of the price of X, so I just wrote you a check for Y!” you…

Step 15: Ignore your built-like-a-God-Damn-Cheetah partner who looks worried when you proudly tell him you ran for a whole 6 minutes today and says he “doesn’t get” how running could possibly hurt.

This is actually really good advice, and it’s how I clambered onto the running wagon in the first place. Run to the end of the street, walk the next, run the next. And pretty soon, probably much sooner than you think, you’ll feel fine at the end of the street and keep running until you get to the end of the next one.…

Labs do indeed have a tendency to get rather rotund, especially as they get older, which is why owners need to be extremely vigilant about their training and about making sure they are adequately exercised. It’s pretty easy to work out what a dog should be eating and then if you’re firm right from the beginning about…

Yep, I flipped the heck out after my husband left 2/3 of a Terry’s Chocolate Orange on our end table overnight and our dog (who we’d had for all of a week at that point) tore open the packaging and ate it ALL. I didn’t even notice until we’d gotten back from our morning walk, during which she had admittedly been…

My parents remodeled their back garden three times in an effort to make it dog-proof; they have a penchant for greyhounds and lurcher-type dogs (understandable) and even though our lawn was pretty hardy there was no real way to stop their first rescue churning up the whole thing whenever he went outside. Cleaning his…