Kockenlockers. Phooey!

I'm really good looking, and not at all fat, so I think George Clooney should play me.

Apparently Kristen Stewart is half Australian. Can she be her own non-union Australian equivalent?

"I love these lazy Christmases."

Say 'what' again. Say 'what' again, I dare you. I double dare you, motherfucker, say 'what' one more goddamn time.

SCREENER, MOTHERFUCKER! DID YOU LEAK IT?

Where the fuck is Firefly Ballers?

I liked this show better when it was called Carpool.

HAHAHA OBUMMER IS A PRETTY BIG JOKE #BENGHAZI #DEATH PANELS #WHERESTHEBIRTHCERTIFICATE? #MYCAPSLOCKKEYISBROKEN

Great Job, Pedant!

He's the best friend Affleck needs, but not the one he deserves right now.

Just to clear things up for you, Supergirl contains potassium Melissa Benzoate.

In the Bizarro A.V. Club you get CancerAIDS for lasties and downvoted for not using a hashtag. #bizarro

The Deep Space Nine reviews are <========= thataway mister!

You've been watching the Giants game too, I take it.

Yes. Yes you are.

I haven't seen TFA yet, but this sounds like a genuinely classy flourish from Abrams.

Would you say it's a Classic Poeformance?

Man, that goop is fuckin' tasty!

Uh, yes.