At this point it’s like somebody doing the Macarena in 2004 or my 72-year-old aunt discovering discredited 5-year-old reactionary Facebook memes about long-form birth certificates.

I hope that Dibble’s conversation with the bot controlling the Gomez account lasts longer than Dibble’s high school baseball coaching career.

Better than the Baltimore Laudanum and Absinthe-Addicted Hydro-encephalitic Authors or the Baltimore Modells.

I thought ghosting was when you insist on tandem pottery-making while some dreary oldie plays in the background

Kid (whispering) Shoulda gone to Chicago. Your brand-building is for SHIT.

I still like that the overdub is Maurice LaMarche basically doing the voice he’d later do for Pinky & The Brain.

This has Tim-Roth-as-Sepp-Blatter-level hit written all over it.

(Ty Webb voice) Don’t sell yourself short, Donald. You’ll probably not be a successful anything.

I thought Fisk was Edgar’s voice with a fancier, more meandering vocabulary. I would have also liked to have heard him exclaim: “Mr. Murdock, I ~am~ in a world of shit!”

I think this is in-game meta-commentary pertaining to his own writing.

Sounds like Private Pyle after being concussed by the butt of a rifle, although it’s good to see he got all them jelly doughnuts.

To further celebrate this new Reds era, he’ll bring out a fish tank and a flaming bag of dogshit to every regular season at bat.

“Did you like John Wooden and UCLA, Dan?”

I’ve made a highlight reel of Indira Varma and her ass-kicking Dornish offspring and I feel universal maternity leave and child care is right around the corner.

“Take a salt tablet. Failing that, how about eat Vicodin like Tic Tacs?” — Jim Irsay

Look, there’s only one treatment endorsed by young Vito Corleone: fire cupping.

“And if in the infinitesimal off-chance you’re having lifelong neurological problems, just dip into the bags of cash you have lying around in your car for treatment”

Man of Steel made $700 million worldwide and took a giant dump on the Superman franchise; Superman Returns made $400M and holy shit where do I even start; Batman and Robin made $250M and is widely considered one of the worst movies of all time...

According to the ancient prophets this is the sign that finally closes the gender wage disparity gap for good

Under the baseball code, which is as old as the Code of Hammurabi, this means that a Jays reliever has to bean the catcher’s wife at her next book club meeting, at which point the rest of the ladies attack the retaliating pitcher and the benches clear.