The new person who I'm seeing is in a similar social circle, and what I'm worried about is setting up the situation so that it's likely to happen all over again. We have a lot of mutual friends that I met ages ago (while with the ex/before me and my current beau got together) and am socializing with them more now that…

I think the hardest part has been the loss of mutual friends who didn't condemn (and therefore, in a roundabout way, totally condoned) his behaviour. The geographic disadvantages of having moved makes it harder for them to be there for me, admittedly. It's mostly my guy friends, which makes it feel like some kind of…

Thank you for your kind words and advice. The anger motivated me to leave both the home and the city I was living in within the first 24 hours of finding out. I have gone completely No Contact despite his initial wishes to "be friends" (who needs a friend like that?!). You and I are on the same page. :)

I am in the "muddle" phase you are describing. Such an angry, fucked up mess, and currently in a lovely, albeit probably ill-advised relationship. The dissolution of my prior relationship is a great yarn, with lots of hi-jinks and laughs. Hilarity really does ensue.

I am grateful that my long term ended without the lifelong tie of children. I feel you on the crazy. With you on the cheating thing too, one would hope that people grow and one day become mature enough to discuss problems instead of just running off with someone else but rarely they do.

I have a friend whose parents live next door to one another and have done so for the 30 years or so that they have been divorced. They aren't even on speaking terms but I suppose the arrangement was convenient while the kids were growing up?

Not anymore.

I was in a relationship of a comparable length and I now feel that length isn't really the measure of its success. The length of time it took one of you to work up the nerve to either amicably break up (or conversely, sabotage a relationship), means absolutely nothing.

About a soldier on deployment.

Kiwi here. No kinja, this post wasn't written "yesterday". Sigh

I saw this necklace the other day on ifls! I want the DNA bracelet. :)

I have been seeing my guy for about the same amount of time. I bought him a gift and literally expected nothing back, it was just about doing a nice thing and getting him something he really liked. And he did really like it, so I win at gift giving.

Welcome! Where are you in NZ?

A Short History of Nearly Everything by Bill Bryson

Oh dear. The adorableness was almost undone by the little guy circling next to him though. Uh oh.

I USED to have a terrorist dog. And despite having post graduate qualifications in animal behaviour, the only solution that ended up working for me was my ex getting her in the divorce.
I got to keep the other guy who was much more mellow - and I got that impression the very first day I met him, I just chose well. I…

Haha! I think the guy I'm seeing had our first legit argument over this topic - where we choose to waste our time online. I prefer Jez and Gawker media in general, where he is a Redditor. And boy, what a lurker. He had some preconceptions about Jez too, but when I prompted him they were something to do with…

That attitude is super attractive too, so keep doing your thing and he will probably change his mind... just at the point where you are over it, and probably interested in someone else. Ah, life.

That is the sweetest, weirdest (conceptually) gesture ever. Your granddad sounds wonderful.

Still, this article suggests she threw the first actual punch. That's not cool.