Tony Romo broke three ribs hearing about Jordy Nelson breaking two ribs.

Except they kept pronouncing it “hoor” and nobody knew what the fuck they were saying.

Manziel doesn’t look like he’s doing well.

She was never that good of an MMA fighter. She had 1 big skill and no real coaching. As the level of athletes increased and people’s skill levels went up, she just stayed the same.

Always a tea-bag truther in the crowd

“PUT A PENCIL UP RECTUM TO MAKE BOWEL MOVEMENT TO GET GAUZE PATIENT SWALLOWED TO COME OUT”

You are a charmer. Did Santa shit in your stocking? The fucking article that I can’t read doesn’t say “oh they got it at the one not a touchdown.” It vaguely says the touchdown was taken away, upon review. Merry Christmas dickhead.

Found the Eagles fan.

You know you’re drunk when then somehow charge you with *two* counts of DUI for sitting in a stationary car.

I admit it.....I watched the video in the hopes that his buddies would let go of the chair....violently hurling him back to earth resulting in a very painful fractured tailbone.

The phone is plugged in! That’s what the lightning bolt on the far right means!

Related: This is the best fan sign I’ve ever seen.

Oh, so now my penis doesn’t count?!

i CTE what you did there

it probably doesn’t require a Bill Nye–type to guess that the adhesive was probably a little more stiff and crackable 

“This is great since you can’t spell ‘concussion’ without C.” - Roger Goodell

I was 100% on board and ready to buy. Then I saw to purchase is an in app purchase and not actually buying it in the app store. This means that it won’t work with family sharing.

My first thought:

Add another Pryor to Pacman’s rap sheet!

“Cleveland faces the Bills next Sunday” was the first draft of Hemingway’s famous six-word story.