I'm a bi woman, and although I was in a fairly long term female relationship in college, it was kind of a secret (I wasn't really "out" to my parents; she was around all the time and probably anyone could have easily guessed, but we never talked about it) and since I'm getting married to a man in less than two months,…

That seems like it's the healthiest option for you. Maybe one day he'll get his shit together and you'll be able to be friends, but it seems like he's kind of idealizing the sort of behavior you want to stay away from. Sad, but good decision, I think.

having sisters and female friends probably helps a lot in seeing women as actual humans, I think. Same in reverse - women are less intimidated by men if they grew up with lots of brothers and/or male friends, because they see that they are human, and since you were equal as children, there's no reason you can't be…

Mostly! I know quite a few women who don't know the difference, either, although that's more with regard to financial habits than sexual…

Is part of your uncomfortableness that you think you will be less important to him than people who are paying him for his time? Sort of like, "Oh, well, of course we can't date every night because you have to make money sexing other people" - and then you're second class?

Yeah, I think some people don't know quite what that word means, and that it's actually different from "wants."

I used to take the bus up to Boston on a fairly regular basis to visit my ex and one time the bus was very crowded, and I got the very last seat, all the way in the back next to the bathroom. This big, mostly-bald guy with major muscles comes in and sits down next to me. I've got music on and I'm giving off major…

Yeah, I think a similar thing happened to Alexander Hamilton. When they threatened to blackmail him with evidence of an affair (which they originally thought was something else entirely), he went public with the whole thing. His wife was pissed, of course, but their ammunition was gone. Brave choice.

That happened with most of the dates I went on. We sort of mutually decided that it wasn't happening and we both stopped communicating.

The only time I ever got messages on the pay sites was during free communication weekends, and then the messages were "here's my email address, so you can email me later for free!" I conclude that very few men were willing to pay for the site anyway (or at least none that were interested in me).

I met my fiancé on OK Cupid, and his mom met his stepdad on Match.com. I was on it for quite a while before we met, though. I think just like anything else you have to stick with it for a while, and it depends a lot on your area, but if you don't have other ways to meet people and aren't terribly social IRL (neither…

You can be as loud as the hell you want when you're making love. At least, according to Gary Coleman.