The same people who were upset about men dressing as women to sneak into public bathrooms are going to defend this.

My exact reaction. I’m happy for you Donald! So, so, happy....

What’s important to remember is that there are numerous theories floating around for a reason: to obfuscate the truth. A little known tradition of the Illuminati is the spousal membership. When Kanye became Illuminati he asked that the rites be extended to Kim as well, so she received what is known as an infinity…

You know that line that people say a lot that goes, “When someone gets robbed, no one goes around saying that they asked for the thieves to take their money?”

I have judged the ever loving fuck out of the commenters here who were nasty about Kim’s robbing. Victim blaming is a ugly thing.

It was a secret that Donald Glover had a girlfriend; it is now no longer a secret because they had a baby.

I feel for Melania’s feet. Ouch.

next to a half empty PBR that’s mostly backwash.

Obama is so handsome. Not just by comparison, but goddammit. It’s like putting a glass of French wine next to a half empty PBR that’s mostly backwash.

This is one of those Picture Worth a Thousand Word moments:

My girlfriend and I were talking about this during the debate. Just like his homes, his suits look so, so, so cheaply made. He likely spends a ton of money on each suit, only to look like he’s wearing a suit that belongs to someone else.

Oh look! It’s Vincent Adultman, heading off to a long day at the business factory!

Nah, it’s not just that he’s fat. I’m fat, and a $600 made-to-measure suit makes me look plenty sharp.

He looks dumpy and his ass looks like a burlap sack filled with snakes.

Janet Jackson comes to mind. She was bigger than Lady Gaga and totally lost her career because Justin Timberlake ripped her bra off and her nipple was exposed for a split second. She was branded a trashy whore who was ruining America’s values for doing nothing but getting accidentally exposed, but Justin Timberlake,…

The federal government currently guarantees twelve weeks of unpaid maternity leave

I could be wrong, but i’m begining to think Ivanka Trump may not be a very good person.

The internet never forgets. 

“He is the only one who can.”