He does have a shit-eating grin

I’m guessing the disgusting rumor is that he’s into scat, right? He’s a powerful dude and they all like being degraded and dominated in the bedroom (or in his case the bathroom.) Like that Senator from Lousiana and his diaper fetish.

I am the Semen King

On my balls, on my dick then I bust a nut quick. On her face, on her chest, stick my dick between her breasts. Come on fellas, let’s get weird. Stick your dick up in her ear.

Luckily, Olsen’s wife will never see this.

So where do you put your vagina?

Good thing that social media doesn’t decide innocence or guilt. RATIONAL people are upset because he didn’t get a fair trial.

Who gives a shit about Steven Avery? What about his nephew, Brendan?

#NeverForget

I put on headphones before watching that video. I am now deaf.

This woman is a true hero. I should celebrate by sending her pictures of my genitals, right?

Baby Poop is the worst poop. After changing several hundred (if not thousands) of diapers, including quite a few “explosions,” I can honestly say that getting shit on myself no longer grosses me out or even bothers me. Poop Immunity.

I think the NBA All-Star Game halftime show would be at least 10% better if Sting audbily sharts while singing.

You still wipe?

I mean, after I’m done wiping yes? Who taught this guy how to go to the bathroom?

That crinkling sound was him opening the crackers, which he then PUT DOWN ON THE FLOOR.

I saw Insane Masturbatory Rampage open for Slayer in '92.

Billy, I hate to nitpick, but I have a problem with the headline. The phrase "insane, masturbatory rampage" should be "insane masturbatory rampage." You shouldn't use a comma when the last adjective outranks its predecessor and is an integral part of the noun phrase. In this case, the rampage is not both insane…

Sortland had a blanket, a cell phone and a box of Wheat Thins with him.

More like Stefan Snortland, amiright?