Time to start replacing Dodge Chargers, Ford Explorers and Chevy Tahoes with specially detuned Mitsubishi Mirages. 

It would’ve been even funnier if “Don’t Cheap Out On Condoms” linked to Jalopnik’s article a few years back “Just Buy The Damn Minivan”.

I would love this on a winter’s evening when I’m using my car as a break room but I’d also like it to dim, a lot, when I release the parking brake. 

I don’t hate it, other than the pointlessly scowling grille. If it’s that cross about being a Corolla maybe they *could* call it something else.

It’s surprising that there’s apparently no “all lights must work” standard in the UK MoT test manual that would’ve required manufacturers to, at a minimum, mask off and paint the clear-white lenses on cars with nonfunctional reverse lights. 

If only it went just as fast but looked like this;

Had to look up where Saugerties is, I had a vague idea it’s in the Capitol District but missed it on the first skim-through so thought this was somewhere in the NYC area or its’ burbs. Turns out I was half right, it’s halfway between Albany and Poughkeepsie. 

LOGISTICS. Now with sunroof.

Time to start implementing a “Drive the Dent” policy for damaged but drivable police cars, and replacing Chevy Tahoes and Ford Explorers with Mitsubishi Mirages that have had the front seats hiked ALL the way forward and bolt upright before installing the cage.

Call it what it is, the “(Republican) Politicians’ Right-To-Lie Act”.

How about a Marauders-era magical police procedural starring (the real) Mad-Eye Moody? Sound good? Only question left is, Cortina GXL or Vauxhall VX4/90?

This is what happens when all you hear about a job for going on 10 years is that the robots are on their way to take it anytime now. 

There were no differences but there SHOULD have been!

At least you can’t pump electricity into a plastic bag.

Same reason why they didn’t fuck up the trucks until the last redesign. Top management thought of it as a sideline and didn’t meddle in development like they would with “core” products.

0-60 in 5-7 business days.

Or something moderately desirable at the bottom of its’ depreciation curve. NC Miatas, SN95 Mustangs, that sort of thing. Drive it and enjoy it while you’re waiting anyway, just in case. 

So I got my second dose  last week too, and I still get only 3 lousy bars of 5G, max. And if Bill Gates has mind-control power how come his wife’s divorcing him? I’m starting to think that whole part of it was a hoax and all I got from the vaccine is immunity to covid.

The bar of expectations was set so low there would be no jumping or vaulting. He could only step over it or trip on it, and he stepped over it. 

I don’t like how everything even vaguely sporty now has to have a black headliner.  It’s not so bad coupled with a panoramic sunroof but the  Corolla hatchbacks are the  same way and only come with a tintop, no sunroof option, so it’s really cavelike and feels tiny in there.