Quest #265 (50%):
[X] Obtain 65 Octorok Skulls
[ ] Deliver to Nauru the Innkeeper

Casual cynicism and outright contempt for people you don’t like makes you cool on the internet.

Hey Kirk, remember when I was laying odds on how quick we were gonna get this comment?

Referring to women as “females” definitely helps your credibility here...

Nobody deserves to be abused.

Green.

The only winning move is not to play.

I mean, the Federalists did distrust the general populace enough to keep even landless white men from voting. Folks like Adams referred to democracy derisively as “mobocracy” and a “leveling spirit.” That’s why we have the electoral college, after all. But fuck trying to live our lives in the mold of elite men who…

Very cool. I have a theory about 80's gaming. I don’t think gaming would have grown so quickly in the 80's and early 90's if it didn’t primarily target children. Adults want things to make sense quickly (watch how fast many adults get frustrated with technology, while a kid will sit and mess with it) and a lot of home…

As someone who knows attorneys who only do document/contract review, I can tell you: A lawyer has to have some fun or they will go crazy.

‘Oh, Most Serene Doge...’

Millennia.

How long have you been waiting for this? XD

As many may know, when I was emperor, i tried something similar, except I had the decency not to overstep and only made MY horse a senator.

This isn’t exactly the kind of animal husbandry I had in mind...

Does horse-marriage in a ‘neigh’boring country count as casus belli?

Wife material. Literally the woman you will die with...

Holy shit, mate!

When she shows up at your apartment 2 days later, while you are at work, asks the landlady if she can get inside as she’s “moving in soon.” To make it even more interesting, she only had my name and my work issued cell phone number and she somehow found my home. That was a big red flag.

The IRS will accept this as the reason my taxes are screwy, right?
“I jumped on a cloud when I should have stomped on the koopa. But otherwise they’re totally right! When can I expect my mushroom to be deposited into my account?”