Ima always come back 10x harder

I’m not even that cynical but as a former PD myself ... lots of the times you thought the speech worked it probably didn’t and you just never found out.

Okay - you put a lot into this one so I will drop the attitude and try to respond.

College football - it’s FAN-TERRIBLE! You’ll never believe how many different ways both teams can choke!!

The only possible explanation is that this was specifically engineered to test just how far reactionary Jalopnik commenters are willing to go in defending the indefensible decisions of an HOA.

She also followed Chuck & Nancy on twitter around the same time. Most likely this is just some super-double-cross-reverse-psychology lib-owning feint, but I also like to imagine that she’s like the grandma-possessed black servant woman in Get Out, her suppressed soul having a momentary spasm of wakefulness.

Okay, forget the baby. Let’s say my 15-year-old graciously offers to take my 10-year-old to the park so me and mom can have some alone time and fuck? I don’t much care whether it’s a maid or a SWAT team that’s ruining the moment. (Unless ... but on the other hand ...)

This will is hilarious. He specifically gives his travel points to his wife. And then doesn’t bother enumerating any other assets and just says “oh yeah and everything else she also gets.” What??

I was just as ready as everyone else to come in hot with the “aw shit now dead Craig Sager sucks too?!” take but honestly this is mostly just bad lawyering. The family worked this out - no one is outwardly mad about the substance, but the process has been bungled. Even if the probate action was somehow unavoidable,…

We would have also accepted “miniature buttocks”

top row ftw by the end of the 1st quarter

Also note that no one in that crowd even opens their mouth to refute this bullshit.

I also like that he began with an anecdote about a weed-related DUI. My friends this is not a guy who has never driven home after a couple too many martinis:

“I’m about as far from being a racist as I can get,” Alford added.

Indeed. Cam Newton and Donald Trump share the distinction that everyone other than the people actually in a position to make an informed evaluation has thought hard about and has a strong opinion about their brain health.

Wait are you proposing that we can just have computers do it? Because otherwise you’re not proposing to do away with a job, you’re just saying the job can be done best by people who try to behave like automatons. And if you think that, you’re out of your mind.

there doesn’t need to be any human element to refereeing

I went to Disneyland with my wife, 6-year-old and 8-month-old this fall. Every day involved a chunk of time in which one parent was with the kiddo at the park and the other was in the room with a napping baby. A “security check” during this time would have been met with a demand for our fucking money back and a…

I agree that the appropriate way to deal with this whole situation is to bring back an idea from roughly the 1930s.

Cam Newton is going out and there playing and winning