Seriously, Joe Horn could have called his mama and his agent by the time this guy got his mask on.

Tony Stewart says you make sure she's 18 first, then stick it in her ear.

Wow, QVC is really branching out with the diamonique.

@Weed Against Speed: That really cool fart sound you can do with your hand and armpit.

This totally blows Dale Jr.'s interview with Playboy out of the water with TMI.

I have said it before and I will say it again:

I love a good rumble! Were Ponyboy and Soda there?

Phillip Fulmer and Fred Thompson: separated at birth?

What IPTAY stands for today:

Does this make Ocho crazier that Clinton Portis?

So his initials will be COC....

"standing on his seat cursing, using inappropriate language and acting in a disrespectful manner while reeking of alcohol."

@Hank Scorpio-Steinbrenner: SAS will rake him over the coals for being on Dancing With The Stars.

"Tonight put it on me."

@UkraineNotWeak: I won tickets for the Braves game next Friday against the Nationals. Good to know we will have the whole stadium to ourselves.

Rock, Paper, Scissors > Rock Fight

Sorry Barbaro, better luck in a bottle of Elmer's I guess.

Looks like he is trying to give the People's Eyebrow on the plaque.

Just because Paris got to Urlacher first, LiLo has to have a Bear too.

@Pardon_The_Bad_Post: I smell a David Lynch movie somewhere in there.