This defensive side of the play seriously should’ve been part of the headline and also the lead gif/image.

BUT IT’S SO MUCH FUN!

Agreed. It’s a far more exciting situation. Of course, that would mean that the NFL would admit that the NCAA game does something better than they, which Goodell and Co. simply CAN’T do.

He’s just slowly tapering the whole thing over the next two years in preparation for his Yankees-mandated lack of facial hair.

As a Dallas-born, Texas-raised Cowboys fan, it’s definitely fun to see from both sides here, and you’re spot on with your stats there. I also feel like I could have a few beers with you and bitch about Washington together while having a damn good time, so cheers, division rival fan!

And then MLBN needs to go whisper sweet nothings into Tim Kurkjian’s ear now that his role is also reportedly being “significantly reduced”.

Double since it was dead-balled right after the ump on the field called it an out initially.

Yeah, my older sister used to work for Delta and it was the same thing when we basically flew for just the price of taxes and airport fees: you’re going to be seated if there’s a free spot, and that spot may be in business class, so you must dress at least business casual. They were usually fine if I was wearing my…

As a Cubs fan, it’s also giving me an existential crisis too.

I think your wife just inadvertently discovered a subliminal reason why I’m enjoying baseball far more than NFL football these days.

Okay, okay, “puto” is bad - am I alright to still yell out “culo” though?

They thought ahead and told those fucks down at the league office that they don’t roll on Shabbos.

Cardinals hit by a train, you say?

Jesus fucking christ, what the hell?

Mom has been “Mom” my whole life, but I will very exasperatedly say “MOTH-ERRRR!” when she’s annoying or nagging or embarrassing me (or trying to send me End Times dry food supplies even though I’ve told her a million times to stop doing that).

Y’all didn’t grow up with neighbors who spoke Spanish, did you? Mamá and Papá are almost as common as the shortened Amá and Apá where I spent my childhood.

I didn’t realize Carlos Gomez had died and been reincarnated already.

Wait, have you seen Anthony Rizzo twerk (or dig out a bad throw to first, smack a huge dinger, or make a walltop circus catch)? Because I know that kind of stuff gets me hot and bothered. Also, two words: high socks.

That is almost exactly the kind of sex ed I got during 6th grade (thank you blessed Anne Richards), and SURPRISE! I’ve been sexually active half of my life and still no unplanned pregnancies or STIs! Crazy how nature do that.

I’m a longtime Cubs fan and proponent of consensual safe sex between mature adults, so that’d shut it down right away. Thank fuck that Theo traded him off for Stringbean.