Why not? Fresh air, lots of exercise, all the Butts I can fumble...

Wow, dad. You’re going to be a monorail conductor

He probably got it from riding on the Monorail.

Is it? I’d rather play for the Jets than have to watch the Jets. 

It’s like my Gramps used to say, “Darned if you do, Darnold if you don’t...”

My girlfriend’s sister had mono when we were all in college. I was terrified I’d get it because my girlfriend was the super jealous type and she would have accused me of kissing her sister or something. And the last thing I’d want is my girlfriend yelling at me because then my wife would find out.

Y'know, I thought I had mono once for an entire year. Turns out I was just really bored.

Should’ve kept him away from Joe Namath.

Lucky him, it’s better than being on the field while the Jets will be going 0-6.

I recently heard from one person about an incident from sixty years ago. Sixty years passed before they were ready to talk...sixty.

My sister was assaulted, and reported it immediately, like the thought she was supposed to. Then she got interrogated and abused all over again by the people who were supposed to help her, while the perp got off with a slap on the wrist.

One friend took years before she admitted to HERSELF she was raped. And she is SUPER feminist.

my wife (girlfriend at the time) was sexually assaulted (groped) by a friend who was a PT student practicing massages. She was scared to report it. I encouraged her to go to the hall Priest (Catholic college). The dude who groped her said “she sent me signals she was interested.” Sure, dude. She had to defend her…

I have, over the course of my life, known a handful of women who were sexually assaulted in some fashion. And this is just the ones who I knew well enough that they would share something like that, usually years after the fact. None of them reported their assaults to the police. 

“limited set of readers... in the South Florida area…”

Its amazing how men always know exactly how they would react and exactly what they would do if they were ever forcibly raped by a man (let alone a very famous man) when its something they have no reason to ever worry about.

“But if you knew anything about Kelly, who is infamous amongst the thankfully limited set of readers and colleagues in the South Florida area for being an idiot and a shitty reporter, this really wouldn’t surprise you at all.”

Yes, That is correct. Just Unlike Alabama, the Phillies pay their athletes, but the Phillies do it legally under contract, instead of having boosters palming wads of bills to teenagers for “washin’ the car real nass an’ purdy”.

Yes,  That is correct.  Unlike Alabama, the Phillies pay their athletes.

Yeah, I would think an MLB player would understand that he actually has to you know “catch” the ball before throwing up his hands like fuck you I took that ball back from dingerland he can’t run.