Like the name of a white supremacist emo band!

Kid was born on April Fool's Day. The wife looked at me and said "You know your brother's the father right?"

You know, reading your nice sandwich ladies story makes me wonder if a "Dream customers" change of pace wouldn't be a good idea for a future edition of BCOs. Like an edition featuring emails about a customer or co-worker or boss who really just made your fucking day somehow.

8th Grade trip story, or worst (best?) Chopped basket ever?

I like how these people think they're like the only motherfuckers on the planet who question tipping and defend being total fucking cheapskates. "OMG! Brace yourself for my mega unpopular opinion about tipping!!!" Hey fucknostrils, cheapasses like you are a dime a fucking dozen and the internet is bleeding with your…

And I see you like pooping. I like pooping as well.

Stop gray-sism! GRAY LIVES MATTER!!!!

T'was the summer of 2006. I was a server at the Olive Garden. (Editor's Note: Thank you for actually calling the place by its name) Those were dark times.

I don't mind Kinja too much. The only thing that bugged the hell out of me is that when I wanted to look up, say, that one Deadspin article where Magary used a lot of cusswords and allcaps or Burneko's 10,000 word ham sammich recipe, Kinja was completely fucking useless. I don't even bother using Kinja's search…

Ma great grandpappy Jim didna storm the beaches of Iwo Normandy just fer you ta include superfluous Ls in yer highlight truthin'! IT'S "HE TRAVELED" WITH ONE L! What're you, some sorta limey? WE SAVED YER ASSES IN DOUBLE YA DOUBLE YA TOO!!!!

Make no mistake. Motherfuckin' bear is training for Bear-mageddon. We need to enact the Bear Tax before it is too late...

This shit would make an epic fucking episode of Kitchen Nightmares.

Perhaps, but even then both those buzzer beaters happened in the Elite 8 and not the Sweet Sixteen. A smaller error though than outright misremembering the opposing team in the game...

THANK YOU. Serrano is terrible. "Pop-a-doc"? Are you fucking kidding me? Fuck Shea Serrano.

I wonder what an apologetic fan of something is like? Not being a dick but just chuckling silently at the thought of you making a point of telling people how sorry you are for liking Bill Simmons.

You're just jealous that YOU'RE not a Vertical Integration Machine™!!!!!!!!

And the goddamn Redskins. And when the heck did Laettner ever hit a buzzer beater against Utah? How are you a Duke fan who doesn't know it was against Kentucky?

Does it violate the "healthy" clause if the injury was CAUSED by a Stockton elbow to the head?

+1 Stockton Elbow to your junk

#REVERSERAYSISM!!!!