redacted

Ho! oh! oh! You got me! I hate to generalize here, but you're a fucking retard. Have a nice day.

"The fact that Ward scored on Tim Thomas, self-described "free citizen" and Ron Paul fan."

"Guess this is how I should have done it."

He explained to the authorities that he just wanted it for Superchunk to sign.

"I would have preferred to play on this turf instead of Veterans Stadium."

It's too hot today.

At least we know he won't divulge information on his secret, illegal accounts.

Alpha Epsilon Pi doesn't have hell week.

Great, now the Black Panthers have a bounty out on Peyton....

"Uh, what's that prosecutor's number?"

Do we know what happened to Ian Kennedy's car last night?

Anything that comes from left-center, no one watches anyway.

Our friends at Harvard Sports Analytics Collective did prove however, that Hennessy could be used as Zamboni fuel when the arena is converted.

He hurd Sam was doing it.

Or Occupy Wall Street protester.

That's going to be one green duke.

Belisario apologized profusely for his foolish cocaine use, explaining he thought he was doing steroids.

Atlanta trainers were concerned when Chipper walked in wearing a diaper, then struggled to do his "happy dance".

redacted