Man, these guys really won’t defend anything.

Finally, a video that belongs on Deadspin.

We’re (literally) all Barry Petchesky

Huh. Usually 2 balls 1 strike works in favor of the batter.

Tough decision. His heart is between a rock and a hard place.

Mark Sanchez has studied this photo for several hours. And that was before he knew there was a question about missing legs.

Short.

My grandfather died without ever having seen the cubs win the world series. So, my Dad, ever the crazy asshole he is, brought a radio out on the porch so gramps could listen in from heaven. We all thought he was going out there to jack off, but nope he was going out there to be with his Dad, which I thought was sweet.…

Love the name. My school has a big intramural hockey league, and the second years pick the nicknames that will be on the first years jerseys. Each year we pick the biggest d-bag from the first year class to be the FIGJAM. We’re now up to FIGJAM VII.

Bet your grandfather died in Berlin in 1945.

TJs brand of prosecco! Cheap drunk over here!

What’s everyone drinking?

I guess there are blind spots on these little Carrs.

Technology is incredible these days. I didn’t think it was possible to mic up Art Briles’ conscience.

My dad recently died of lymphoma so this really hits home. If putting Chris Berman on TV will cure cancer once and for all, then I'm all for doing the right thing and not putting Chris Berman on TV.

So, I'm telling her that if she doesn't return the mink, I'm gonna lose my shit, right? You know what she says to me?? "You think I can't just get another one of these from Mookie or Doc?"