If you had to pick one random black dude, Captain Jack is a pretty good choice.

I love the idea that Frank Luntz is meticulously crafting this message with him, coaching on what to say without taking a clear side outside of loving one another, etc. and then Cam’s like “Yeah but I’m going to do it this font” and Frank figures it’s all about making progress and no “zero” days or whatever.

“It’s a lot like Jack Nicholson in the Departed, right? Do a really half-assed job for a lot of money and let the kids do the heavy lifting.”

“It’s a lot like Jack Nicholson in Batman, right? Grab a gun and shoot a couple of rich people if you want a better life. That’s just the way I feel.”

I don’t want to get into the politics part of it and tell you who I’m voting for and all that,

Imagine knowing that there were children being enslaved out there and being like, “You know what, I shouldn’t talk about this to all these reporters, it might distract them from their rightful focus on Matt Hasselbeck.”

Guys, child slavery is really bad and I could’ve done more to fight against it, but I decided to focus on staying quiet because football.

That was fantastic.

Missed the perfect opportunity to snap it to the upback for the nastiest trick play of all time!

I think we should be more worried about this 4th swimmer who is attempting to swim all the way home

Buying Monster because you think cold brew tastes bad is the Marchman cereal list of beverage opinions.

more like Leonidas of ‘Roids.