unfortunately, walt mossber's hip suffered a fate far worse. his fall from a few feet up on a hard surface has left him as gimp as an iPhone at an elementary school carnival. as soon as he is well, though, i encourage everyone to read his new review of LifeAlert.

Hey Giz — I don't know if this segment was out of necessity or what but I think it's genius. next huge release you guys should the same thing. Heck — I wish you did it for the evo.

does anyone have a video of it running flash?

@Gigglebox: what are you talking about?

hold up! the dude that shot the sample video uses Windows. get the pitch forks!

@webdevmike: i thought they were just sending iPhones?

the kid wears glasses. can't even enjoy the retina display.

darn kids! stay off my lawn.

i would be one paranoid iPhone user if i got it early. are there cases out for them yet? i wouldn't leave the house until mine was wrapped up and even then i wouldn't walk off of the carpet.

oh, yeah? look what i can do!

i tend to avoid these "vent" threads because they are usually just full of trolls or people too cheap to pay $100 an hour for a shrink. but since this is jalopnik — i will make an exception. "vent" away, commentariat.

@ProstWest: good thinking. let's hope thieves aren't as well equipped as yourself.

that looks like a scissor jack. those guys obviously took their time ripping him off.

this may sound dumb, but i hate the shifter location on them and a lot of cars. either on the tree or on the floor. not next to the darn radio.

@the_omicron: nice plow.

@slc: you guys are killing me here.

@jboy06: you're english is very good, mr. chinese foxconn under-cover gizmodo representative.

@Chyron: in mass graves.

@barrywoods: but it's alaska. you allow full auto weapons because of the crazy russians.

i suggest everyone move to texas. we have lots of sun and the castle law.