Triscuits and port wine cheese spread are how I know it’s Christmas.

If you think about it, any story about food is the beginning of a poop story.

I pretended to be straight for 20 years. Does that count?

I am so with you. I wait in gleeful anticipation.

Yeah, I’ve always assumed that his character on The Office was just him slightly exaggerating his actual personality.

10/10 would read. Her first book was hilarious and I can’t wait for her book of essays. This should be a hoot.

Smiley is the stuff that Young Bunny's nightmares were made of.

They wouldn't have shown the commercials where you live. Eat n'park is only in PA, OH, & WV. Not sure why the person would think it would be shown anywhere else.

On another occasion the same gentleman asked a lesbian server, "so just what exactly do you people do in the bedroom?"

I go the local WAWA on occasion and get a toasted everything bagel with:

Read that as “pit of Cheetos,” was very excited for a second TBH.

...but some local judges are still declining to issue marriage licenses. The state's Supreme Court has insisted the ban is constitutional.

That was my first thought as well. People don't read signs or handouts. Those employees are gonna get screamed at.

Ugh. As a former retail worker, I feel bad for the employees who are going to have to explain this policy change to very angry shitty asshole customers. Despite signs. Fuck.

My meltdown was over food too. My junior year of college, I was so in love with a guy who was in love with me too, but in a three year relationship. He would later dump his girlfriend, date me for six months, dump me, and then get back together with his original girlfriend. They later got married.

This is a story of how one of the worst days of my life ended up reaffirming my faith in strangers and in the human race in general.

Gawd, I knew I would find this in the comments. The fact that it's feminists who are criticizing him the most proves that, once again, feminists are feminism's worst enemies. We say we want allies but I guess by "allies", we mean "silent masochistic punching bags". It's kinda sad when you're just as disgusted by the…

The only bump a girl needs, IMO.

They don't just funnel - they full on create an account for you! It's crap. I created a nest BEFORE I was engaged (scandal!) and I have no plans on ever having a bump, unless you count the one I've already created thanks to wine and chocolate.